Swirl
by dabbling
Summary: What happens if Nicole Wallace has to go head-to-head with Bobby's mother? B/A story with some help from Logan. Hurt/Comfort and a good mystery. And of course it morphs into something else later.
1. Chapter 1

A/N Okay, so I'm not expecting this to follow canon much. But I do expect it to be a fun ride!

* * *

Swirl

Detective Robert Goren was down. He blinked in the dark. Looking up he could see lights, or maybe stars, but they seemed to be in constant motion, like someone had bumped them and caused them to swirl.

Bobby looked at the lights until he felt sick to his stomach. He couldn't make sense of anything. There was something cold and hard pressing against his shoulders and the back of his head. It hurt.

Somehow he managed to put together the idea that he had to move to make it stop hurting. Bobby summoned all of his strength and tried to roll to one side, but all he managed to do was make the lights swirl faster. He squeezed his eyes shut and swallowed hard. He gagged and coughed and realized all at once that he had a pounding headache.

Goren tried hard to remember what happened. There was some kind of memory but no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't quite get hold of it. He opened his eyes again, saw the lights swirling overhead, and choked.

* * *

"Where the hell is he?" Eames demanded of the men in the room. Every last one of them looked away: out the window, at the floor, at the pockmarks in the ceiling.

She sighed heavily and shook her head. "You asked for him to help. You brought him in and now…?!"

Captain Ross arrived behind her. "Someone care to fill me in?" he asked the group.

"They sent Bobby out alone, and now they've lost contact with him," Alex said.

"We didn't send him alone. He was wired. He was supposed to wait until Martinez got there, but… it looks like he didn't."

"What about the wire?"

"Malfunctioned?" Another man said with a shrug.

Ross looked at each person in the group. "I need to see your Captain," he said finally. One man got up to lead him to the Captain's office, and Eames was on Ross' heels. He spun around and held up a hand to stop her. "Eames," he said firmly. "Wait for me."

She felt like she'd just taken a body blow. Alex stopped hard, and watched Captain Ross walk away. With another sigh, she turned and walked back toward the front door, stopping to glare at the men of the 17th on the way.

* * *

"Well?"

"They've got three units and two teams scouring the neighborhood. If he's there, they'll find him. If not, they'll pick up his trail."

"And meanwhile?" She asked, irritated.

"I know it's hard, but you have to sit back… wait."

She stared at him, agape. "He's my partner!" It sounded like a plea.

"This is their turf, Eames. They've got informants, they know what goes on in the back alleys. We need to let them lead the search."

Every fiber of her being was wired. If he had been anyone but her Captain, he would have gotten an earful, and maybe more. Alex bit her tongue. She spun around and walked away.

* * *

Everything was swirling. Bobby opened his eyes, but he couldn't make heads nor tails of anything he saw. It was a blurred mess of color and light. He couldn't move. He tried to call out for help, but he didn't recognize the sound that came from his lips.

* * *

Alex was doing her best to keep her mind occupied by completing overdue paperwork. It was a struggle. She kept fixating on Bobby's empty chair, and then she would have to force herself to shake off the worry and attend to business again.

She was halfway through a paragraph when her phone buzzed hard against the desktop. She snatched it up.

"Eames." She listened, and a hopeful terror rose up inside her. "I'll be right there."

* * *

It sounded like someone was playing a game of Pong at the end of a long hallway. The steady blip came without fail. Bobby started to listen for the next beat. He was not disappointed.

Slowly, his mind started to activate. He realized that Pong was an outdated game, that it made no sense that someone would be playing it. He wondered what the sound really was. Bobby tried to turn his head toward the sound.

"Bobby?" a voice said. The voice was soft, and familiar. He opened his eyes, and her face, multiplied four times, swirled before him.

"Eames," he tried to say. Something similar escaped his lips.

"Oh, God, Bobby, I'm so glad you're awake."

Her words didn't make sense. He only heard a few of them. But her voice was comforting, and even with the swirling, her face was familiar.

"Bobby, can you hear me?"

"Eames," he said again, and this time the whispered word sounded right. He felt her hand covering his, and his eyes rolled back, the lids closing.

Alex Eames breathed a sigh. He was getting better. The staff said so, and now he had finally come to, and even better, he'd spoken to her. Bobby wasn't out of the woods yet, but he was getting better, and for that she was grateful.

* * *

"What happened to him?" Ross asked, his calm demeanor not betraying the deep anger he felt inside.

"Tox screen showed Pancuronium Bromide in his system."

"What the hell is that?"

The detective squirmed under the stern look on Ross' face. "It's a paralytic. It looks like they knocked him in the head, and were keeping him sedated for some reason." The detective shifted his weight on his feet. "The doctors think he was kept like that for close to six hours."

"What else do they say?"

"He's damn lucky his heart's still beating. His autonomic functions are still working, and that's some kind of miracle, given that he was under the influence of the drug without proper monitoring."

"What did they hit him with?"

"Blunt object, thin. Maybe a piece of rebar."

"Find any rebar in the area where he was abducted?"

"Not yet, sir."

"I want to know every move he made from the time you lost contact with him. If you guys can't figure it out, I'll loan you a team from Major Case."

"Don't worry, Captain Ross. We'll get to the bottom of things."

"Miles," Ross called. "How did they administer the drug?"

"Injection point in his side and another one in his left arm."

"Any chance there's a blonde woman involved?"

"Sir?"

"Look up Nicole Wallace. Add her to your suspects."

"Yes, Captain."

Ross watched Detective Miles scurry away and quietly entered Goren's hospital room. Eames was at his side, holding his hand and staring at the veins that were pushing up under his skin. Her thumb traced along one of them slowly.

"Any change?" Ross asked.

Alex nodded. "He came to. Recognized me."

"That's good," Ross said, somewhat surprised.

She looked over at him. "It's… hard… to see him like this," she said quietly.

Ross frowned and nodded at her. In a soft voice, he told her what he had just learned from Miles.

"Wallace?!" Alex said, shocked. They hadn't heard from her in over a year. Everyone thought she was dead. Everyone, except Bobby and Alex. She looked down at her partner and her grip on his hand tightened. If it was Wallace, they were damned lucky Bobby was still alive.

"Did you contact his family yet?"

She shook her head. "His mother… she's, uhm… emotionally… fragile. She may not be able to handle it. And his brother… I don't even know if Bobby knows how to reach him."

"You may want to reconsider telling his mother. If she's emotionally fragile… and he doesn't…"

"He's going to recover," Eames said firmly.

Ross looked around. He knew Eames wanted to believe that. He wanted to believe it, too. But the truth was that Goren was in the ICU. And even though he had shown some improvement, anything was possible. Still, Eames was Goren's ICE, and the decision was hers. He nodded and gave her a mumbled goodbye, asking to be kept in the loop.

* * *

When he woke in the night, Bobby was alone. The room was still illuminated by recessed lights near the wall. He looked around once, and then again, and did not see her.

His heartbeat quickened, and he called out, but no one heard him. Bobby tried to quell his panic. He was in a hospital, he knew that. He knew that someone was looking out for him. He thought for a moment, and remembered the call button that they always have available in the hospital. He moved his hands, searching for the device or the wire or anything that would do the job. He found a thick cable, but he couldn't seem to reach the end of it. He tried tugging on it, but he still had no luck. His heart rate increased again.

"You're awake?" She asked, breaking the terrifying silence. Bobby's eyes shot in the direction of the voice, and he saw Alex walking closer, with a smile on her face.

"Eames," he said, and took a few deep breaths, trying to calm down.

"What's the matter?" She asked him, seeing right away the odd expression on his face.

"C-couldn't find the… the… to call the nurse…"

"You need the nurse?" Alex asked, tugging on the cable and lifting the remote to her hands.

He shook his head. "J-just… I don't like to be alone."

Alex felt a pang at his words. Her expression softened and she patted his hand. "I'm sorry, Bobby. I had to go find something to eat, I was starved. I thought you would sleep while I was gone."

He nodded, accepting her explanation. With the problem resolved, he relaxed, resting his head deeper into the pillow. He remained alert, though. He was tired, but not sleepy.

"Bobby, do you remember what happened? How you ended up here?"

He licked his lips and thought, then shook his head. "I was wired. What happened to the wire?"

Alex sighed. "We don't know yet. And that alley was about as blind as an alley can get. Besides a vague description from a half-blind senior citizen on the 11th floor, nobody saw anything. No security cameras, no passers-by, nothing." She watched him rub his fingers together, in thought. "Sorry. You shouldn't worry about any of that. How are you feeling?"

"I don't… know…" he moved his hand, frowned at the effort, and dropped it back to the mattress. "Can't… too weak…"

"Okay, Bobby. It's okay," she told him. "You're getting stronger. Give it some time."

He looked into her eyes, and was reassured. He was weak, but Eames wouldn't lie to him. He must be getting better. He closed his eyes for a moment, trying to ease the pain in his head.

"Bobby?" she asked, concerned.

"Head. Hurts."

"Yeah, you got hit pretty hard." She let go of his hand and started to move away. "I should let you rest," she said, and he reached out for her again.

"N-no," he protested. "Stay with me." He managed to catch her hand with his, and his eyes were pleading.

"Okay, Bobby. I'll stay."

He closed his eyes, but kept a tight grip on her hand. "I need to know you're here," he explained.

"Okay," she said quietly, stroking her fingers against his hand.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

"Make it stop," Bobby pleaded, his eyes closed and his fingers tightening around hers. His words were slow, like it took some effort to speak.

"Make what stop?"

"That sound."

Alex looked around, listening. Nothing had changed in his room for hours. She had no idea what was bothering him.

"The beeping."

"The heart monitor?"

He nodded. "Headache," he explained.

"Oh, okay. I'll see if they can turn it off." Alex pushed the call button for the nurse.

"What'cha need, honey?" The nurse asked Goren.

"He said the beeping from the heart monitor is making his head hurt."

"Oh, poor baby," the nurse sympathized. She reached over and turned the volume off. "Better?" she asked.

"Yeah," Bobby whispered.

"How bad is that head of yours?" The woman asked him.

Bobby grimaced and tried to shake his head, but it hurt too much.

She reached out and lifted his lids one by one, shining a light into them. He tried to pull away from her touch.

"You're dilated. And you have a headache?"

"Yeah," he said, frowning.

"Any nausea?"

Bobby nodded.

"How's your vision?" She turned off a couple more lights and asked him to open his eyes. Bobby did, and she asked him to tell her how many fingers she held up. He couldn't do it.

"I'll put a call in to your Doctor. He may want another look at you."

"Oh," Bobby sighed. Alex massaged his fingers, but now her worry had grown. Alex glanced over at the nurse, hoping to get some kind of message. The woman's serious expression only made her worry more.

Alex bent down to reassure Bobby. "I'll be right back, Bobby. I just have to use the bathroom."

He was still frowning, and his eyes were closed, but he nodded and let go of her hand. Alex hurried out after the nurse.

"What's going on with him?" she demanded.

"We'll have to wait and see what the doctor says, but it could be brain swelling or even bleeding."

Alex's face paled, and she raised a hand to her mouth. "How soon will the doctor come?"

"He's already on his way."

Alex felt sick. Knowing she wouldn't want to leave Bobby again, she took a bathroom break and hurried back to his room.

She took his hand again, and he opened his eyes. With lids half-closed, he spoke her name, "Eames." His tongue was thick and he couldn't quite make the sounds right.

"Bobby, are you okay?" Alex asked, concerned.

He mumbled something in response, but she couldn't understand any of it. He closed his eyes slowly, and she couldn't get him to respond again.

Alex pushed the call button. "He couldn't talk, he was mumbling and now he won't wake up," she told the nurse frantically.

"All right, the doctor's on his way." The nurse checked his pupils again, and then stepped quickly into the hall, where she motioned to the station.

The doctor hurried in and made his own assessment, and ordered a CT scan. Bobby's bed was wheeled out of the room, leaving Alex to pace the halls outside radiology.

* * *

"The situation is rather precarious," the Doctor began. "We have been giving him fluids to help flush the Pancuronium Bromide out of his system. The fluids, however, have had the negative effect of increasing the pressure on his brain."

"So what now, then?"

"We will need to continue the fluids, but we'll have to monitor him closely to keep the swelling down. It's tricky, but it can be done successfully."

Alex took a deep breath and nodded. Then she rubbed her weary eyes and took her phone out of her pocket.

"Ross," the man barked.

"Bobby's gotten worse," Alex said, and explained the new developments. "I'm going to send word to his mother. Maybe you can see if somebody can't get a lead on his brother Frank?"

"We'll find him," Ross promised.

Alex ended the call and hung her head. She went to the nearest desk and asked for assistance looking up the number for Carmel Ridge. With a heavy sigh, she dialed.

"Carmel Ridge Home," said a cheerful voice.

"Hello, I need to get a message to Frances Goren?" Alex said.

"She's been checked out for the weekend."

"What? By who?"

"Let me see… her daughter-in-law, Bianca Goren."

"Bianca? Daughter-in-law? She's married to Frank?"

"No, the paperwork we have is signed by Robert."

Alex felt like an icy hand had just closed around her heart. "I need to be notified right away when she returns."

"I'm sorry, who are you?"

"I'm Robert's partner in the NYPD, Alexandra Eames." Alex gave her badge number and her contact information. "If Bianca returns, I need to be informed immediately."

"Certainly," the woman on the line said.

Alex hastily called her Captain back. "She's abducted his mother," Alex said.

"Who has?"

"My guess is Wallace. His mother is in a… a home, okay? And someone came in with false papers saying she's married to Bobby and she signed the paperwork to check out Frances for the weekend."

"Slow down… Frances?"

"Bobby's mom."

"Are you sure Goren's not—"

"Of course I'm sure, Captain! Believe me, if Bobby was married, I would know all about it."

"All right. Give me the address and I'll send—"

"I have to do it."

"What?"

"I have to go, Captain. I'm the only one who knows enough about Bobby… and about Wallace. I have to go."

"Before you make that decision, Eames…"

Her emotions betrayed her, and she spoke through swelling sobs. "Look, I know the situation, Captain, and… I know what I have to do."

"Stop here and I'll send Logan with you."

"I'll go alone," she said, pushing back against another sob.

"You'll go with Logan, or you won't go at all."

Alex let go a little cry and hung up the phone. She went into Bobby's room, wiping away her tears. He was on oxygen, now, and every piece of equipment near his bed had some kind of a digital readout displayed. Alex took his hand once again, and felt a terrible guilt as she recalled how frightened he'd been before when he'd woken up alone.

"I have to go to work, Bobby," she explained through a new wave of tears. "I know once you know why… I know you'll understand. I don't want to leave you, but I have to. Bobby, you've got to fight and stay with us. You've got to keep fighting, Bobby."

Overwhelmed with emotion, she bent over him and kissed his forehead. "I'll be back, Bobby, and you'd better be up and talking by then."


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

"I heard he's not doing so well," Logan said respectfully.

"He's going to be fine," Eames said, her words clipped.

Logan just nodded and grabbed his piece from his gun locker. He settled it in the holster and matched her brisk pace down the hall.

"So, uh… where are we headed?" Logan asked. He pulled open the passenger door and sat down, not even bothering with an offer to drive. He shut the door and clipped his seatbelt, and waited for an answer.

"Carmel Ridge Home," she said.

Logan nodded. "Nursing home, eh?"

"You can call it that," Alex told him. She wasn't about to say more. The file containing the pictures of Nicole Wallace lay on the seat between them. She checked its contents one last time and backed the SUV out of the parking space.

"Ross said somebody thinks it's Nicole Wallace behind all this."

Alex scoffed and nodded. She hated that woman.

"How in hell is she supposed to have abducted his mother? Don't these homes have… you know, security measures?"

"She had some kind of forged document that said she was family."

"Like what?"

"Marriage certificate."

"Marriage? Goren has a brother?"

"He does… but that's not who she was supposedly married to."

"All right, so if she already had him, then why go after his mother?"

"I've been thinking about that. She must not have been able to get what she wanted from him."

"What she wanted? What the hell do you want from a guy who's so drugged up he can't move a muscle?"

Alex frowned. She had a theory about that, but she wasn't willing to let it see the light of day yet.

"Bianca. She said her name was Bianca Goren."

"Bobby and Bianca? Too cutesy, if you ask me."

"Some people like cutesy."

Logan could see she was not her usual self. He was very careful not to push her too far with his questions. The truth was that he needed to know. He needed to know a lot, if he was to be any help to her at all.

"I guess Ross wanted me to watch your back."

Alex shrugged, then frowned.

"I mean, you… worried about Goren and everything."

"Look, Mike, I really would have preferred to do this alone, but Ross insisted. And I don't know why. But if you for one minute think that I can't do my job, that I can't handle myself—"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa… I didn't say that. It's Ross. I'm thinkin' that's what he thinks. I think you're tough as nails. I'm just trying to figure out what the hell I'm supposed to be doing, here."

"You're along for the ride, Logan. Leave it at that."

He sighed, and they rode in silence the rest of the way to Carmel Ridge. As Alex pulled into the drive, he read the smaller print on the sign, and suddenly he understood why she had been so quiet about the place.

"His mother, she's what… dementia or something?"

Alex stopped walking and frowned at him. "She has schizophrenia, Mike. This place was the only place around that could handle her."

He said nothing more, just carried the file and followed her inside. He watched while Alex introduced herself, and they waited for the staff member who'd actually checked Frances Goren out to come to the desk. Mike showed her a picture of Nicole Wallace.

"Yes, that's her. That's Bianca. I was surprised that Mr. Goren was married. I mean, he never wore a ring or anything."

Alex explained to her and the supervisor that they'd been conned. She left specific instructions on what to do if they should see Nicole again. They spoke with a few more staff and got a description of the car, as well.

Logan called in the info on the car and then got in beside Eames.

"I'm hungry," Alex said. "There's a diner a couple blocks down. You want a bite?"

"I could use a meal," he said.

* * *

"If you've been in the US for so damned long, why do you still have that accent?" Frances asked her. "You think it makes you sound smarter, don't you? Or that men will be attracted to you because of it." She looked at her with disgust. "My Bobby would never go for it. He would see right through you."

Nicole scowled. "Well. I suppose he is quite a lot like his mummy, isn't he?"

"I want to go back to Carmel Ridge."

"Not yet."

"Why not? You told me you were taking me to dinner, if you can call that lousy sandwich a dinner. And now you've brought me to this drab apartment where I don't even see a scrap of literature. Why on earth did you bring me here?"

"All will be revealed soon enough," Nicole said. She rooted in her bag and found a magazine. "Here, maybe this will satisfy you."

"Drivel," Frances said, but she kept a tight grip on the reading material.

"You're welcome," Nicole told her. "Make yourself at home. I'll be back soon." With a weary expression, Wallace locked the old woman in the room and grabbed her cell phone.

"Howard? Howard…" She thought of Bobby, and she became excited. "Let me speak to him."

"I've been trying to call you all day," Howard said. "He's not here."

"What?!"

"The place was… they found him. I couldn't go back, Nicole. They would have caught me, too."

"I fail to understand why you weren't with him."

"I went out for a bite. It's pretty boring babysitting like that."

"Where did they take him? He must be in hospital. They would have taken him there straightaway."

"How in hell should I know? I've been laying low."

"Well, now you have work to do. I'm with the old woman. You'll have to find Bobby."

"And do what? Wherever they took him, you know the place is crawling with police. It's over Nicole. A big fail. Ditch the old lady and let's get out of here."

"Howard," she said quietly, though her patience was wearing thin. "Just find out where he is and call me back." She listened to his silence. "Howard, darling… you know that thing I always do to you?"

His face flushed as he remembered. "Yeah," he said, licking his lips.

"I can do it better," Nicole whispered. "You'll never be the same."

"Oh, God," he breathed, and wiped a fresh bead of sweat from his brow. "O-okay, Nicole. I'll just figure out where he is, that's all."

"Love you, darling."

"I love you, too."


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

"My word, you are quite a lot of work, aren't you?"

"No reason for you to put up with it," Frances said. "Just take me back to Carmel Ridge."

Nicole smiled at her, and Frances cringed at the falseness of it. "Not yet, love. Let's have some dinner, shall we?" Nicole kicked the old woman's shoes closer to her. "Get ready, and we'll go someplace nice."

"Nice. I'll hold you to that, Miss."

"Bianca."

"Sure… Bianca." Frances struggled to pick up her shoes and put them on. "When can I talk to Bobby? You told me we could call him."

"Bobby's… busy, love. Perhaps later."

"Maybe he's too busy to talk to that silly accent, but Bobby always calls his mother. He always finds the time."

Nicole humored her with a smile. "Later," she said again.

* * *

Alex nearly ran to Bobby's room. She had called a few times during the day, but she needed to see him. None of it was real until she could see him in person.

Logan walked quickly behind her. He had never been close to Eames, but in the time he'd spent with her today, he had made a decision to stick close to her until this was all over.

Bobby looked much the same as he had in the morning. The monitors were all there, blaring their readouts at anyone who walked in. The volume was back on for the heart monitor, now, too. She listened to its low, steady blip and slid her hand over his.

"Bobby?" Alex said quietly. "I'm back. I'm here for the night unless we get a break in the case. They say you're improving. That's good, that's just what I told you to do."

Logan leaned against the doorframe and watched her talk to him. He saw when her tension eased a little, and he realized again that she was one tough lady. Mike took a few steps into the room. "How's he doin'?" he asked.

"The nurses said he's improving. He's still here, that's what matters, right?"

"Right."

"Look, Mike, I'm gonna… stay here with him...as long as I can. Will you call me if we get a lead?"

"Sure, Eames." He stuffed one hand in his pocket and gave Goren a long look before heading out of the room.

Alex Eames folded her hands together. She put her elbows on his bedside and pressed her knuckles to her lips. Her thoughts were consumed by Nicole Wallace.

The woman was evil, plain and simple. And though Bobby knew it, he was enamored by her as much as he was repulsed. But Nicole had never hurt Bobby before, and Alex couldn't figure why she'd gone that far this time. And then she thought of Frances.

Alex had never met Frances Goren. She had learned enough in her partnership with Bobby to know the woman was intelligent and feisty. Sight unseen, Eames respected her. She'd raised Bobby, and Alex couldn't deny that even with all the difficulties, the woman had done a good job with him.

Bobby had brought her along one time to Carmel Ridge. They were in a tangled mess of a case, and he'd gotten a crisis call on his Mom and he had to see about her. To save time, he'd allowed Alex to drive them up and back on the freeway in the middle of their investigative work.

But she hadn't met Frances. Bobby hadn't even suggested it. Alex had stood by him while he spoke with the nurses and then waited on a floral sofa staring at the endless soap operas running on a television in the corner. He'd been all of an hour, and then he came back, thanked her for making the detour, and they were on their way again.

Alex had at least six different images of the woman in her mind. She didn't even know the first thing about her physical features. Sometimes she imagined Bobby's mother as a tall, dark beauty. She thought in her youth she might have been a model except for her insatiable passion for literature. After all, he must take after her in one way or another…

And other times, she pictured Frances as a frail old woman, wracked by frightful hallucinations. She would picture Bobby swooping in to rescue the old woman from her demons, so sweet and caring in his interactions with her.

But Alex knew she had conjured up Frances Goren as surely as a writer creates a fictional character. Eames was not a profiler, and this was why. When she had limited information, she tended to fill in the gaps with anything that suited her fancy, and she was always way off target.

The truth was that Frances was old, schizophrenic, demanding, manipulative, intelligent and… human. She wasn't perfect as a model, or even as a victim of her illness. She wasn't even a perfect monster. Just when the stories had started to turn Eames' thoughts there, Bobby would share some moment of intimacy, and Frances was a woman again, full of love and fire. Bobby loved her fiercely.

Alex wondered how Nicole Wallace would stand up to the old woman. She knew there were times when Frances could make Bobby crumble with only a few words. She had a feeling the woman might be able to do the same to Wallace.

Then again, that could be the death of her. Wallace was a cold blooded killer, and the only thing she could want with Frances would be to ultimately get to Bobby. Frances Goren was in mortal danger.

* * *

Alex was dozing in the chair when she heard something. She rubbed her eyes and stretched and remembered where she was. "Bobby?" she asked quietly, straightening up to look him over.

He was staring at her through half-opened eyes. Alex gave him her best smile and touched his cheek. "Hey," she said in greeting.

"Alex," he slurred.

"I'm glad to see you," she told him. "You'll be out of here in no time."

"Water?" he asked.

Alex smiled at him. "Sure," she said. She looked over at his bedside table and found the pitcher empty and the paper cup still wrapped in plastic. "I'll be right back," she told Bobby.

Alex stopped by the nurse's station and asked if it was okay to give him water. They recommended ice and prepared a cupful for her. With cup and spoon in hand, Alex went back to Bobby's room.

"You sleeping again?" she asked him, and his eyes opened again. "I got you some ice," she told him. Alex held the spoon to his lips and he took a small amount from the tip of it.

They didn't talk much, but she managed to ease his thirst. The nurse came in and asked him a few questions before leaving once again. He still had a headache, and his speech wasn't very clear. Alex had given the nurse a questioning look, but she'd ignored it and gone back into the hall.

Alex stayed beside him, chatting kindly, until he fell asleep once more. Then she went out to the nurse's station. "How is he?" she asked.

"Just the fact that he is awake and alert enough to answer questions is an improvement."

"But his speech—"

"There's still a lot of fluid on his brain," the woman explained. "With time, it will improve."

Alex suspected as much, even with her limited medical knowledge. She took a couple of deep breaths and headed back into his room.

His whiskers were growing in fast. Without proper attention, the beard was high on his cheeks, not the handsome way he usually trimmed it. She ran her hand over his hair, avoiding the place where he'd been injured. His curls were surprisingly soft, and she let her fingers linger there.

Words of love almost escaped her lips. She realized what she was thinking and drew her hand away, folding her arms tight across her chest. This was Bobby, and if she loved him, it was only as a friend, a coworker. She looked around at the equipment monitoring him and blinked away the tears that had suddenly gathered in her eyes.

Alex turned her thoughts to the mystery of it, the case. She had to find his mother before it was too late.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

"Eames," she said, shaking off sleep and clearing her throat. Bobby looked much the same as before, still and sleeping.

"We found Frank," Ross said. "I've got a unit bringing him down now. Can you handle it?"

"Sure, yeah. I'll wait here for him. Captain… was he using?"

"He seems clean."

"Good."

"And the 1-7 found the weapon they hit him with. He wasn't where he was supposed to be. He wasn't waiting for Martinez."

She looked down and frowned at her partner. "Okay... I'll wait here and deal with his brother, but then I wanna get a look at the scene."

"I'll have Logan call you."

"Thanks, Captain."

"How is he?"

"He woke up once in the night," she said, hopeful. "But he's been sleeping ever since."

"Keep me posted."

"Yes sir."

* * *

Frank Goren wasn't anything like she expected. He was tall, but not quite as tall as Bobby. He was strong, but not with the build of a linebacker or anything. He was thin and wiry and looked like he had shaved with a rusty razor. The officers had sprung for a quick shower for him, and his combed hair was still wet.

"Oh, Jesus… Bobby." Frank said.

"You're Frank?" Alex asked, holding out her hand to shake his.

He turned his eyes away from his ailing brother and shook the petite woman's hand.

"I'm Alex Eames. I work with Bobby."

"You're a cop."

"Detective," she corrected, nodding her head.

"What's wrong with him?" Frank asked, and shuffled inside the room a little farther to stand over his brother. Frank massaged his own hands nervously.

"He has a concussion," she said, "and his brain has some swelling. They said it will take some time to come down."

Frank glanced around at all the machines. "It's a lot of stuff," he said.

"They have to monitor him closely," Alex explained.

Frank shuffled his feet, glanced at Bobby, and then erratically around the room. It reminded Alex of the way Bobby acted when he was nervous. "You know, I haven't seen him in two years. I haven't even talked to him."

Alex took his arm in her hands. "He'll be glad you're here," she told him. "He doesn't like to be alone when he's sick."

"Still?" Frank asked, surprised. He looked over at the woman. "He always did that when we were kids. He could be puking his guts out and then instead of staying in bed he'd follow me around the house. The only way I could ever get him to lie still was if I sat there with him." Frank paused to look at Bobby with affection. "Me, or Ma…" he amended.

Alex's brows knit together. She thought about the case and wondered how much she should reveal to Frank. She had to tell him about his mother, and the only way it would make sense was if she told him the rest of the story about Bobby.

"Sit down, Frank," Alex said quietly. She waited for him to circle the bed and settle into the chair. "Bobby was on the job," she said. "After they hit him, someone injected him with a paralytic drug and kept him that way for several hours. There are two different squads looking into what happened to him." She took a deep breath and continued, "I uh… I tried to call, to get word to your mother." Frank turned his head and his sharp eyes met hers. Again, she was reminded of her partner. "Whoever is behind this," she said, gesturing to Bobby, "they've abducted your mother."

"Ma?! What would anybody want with Ma?!"

"This is something personal with Bobby. Somebody really wants to get to him. To hurt him, or to coerce him…"

Frank raked his fingers through his wet hair, causing it to stick out erratically. "Ma's old, and sick. What if…?!"

"Frank, I'm going to find your Mom. I wanted to make sure you… you'd stay here with Bobby. Another Detective is helping me. We're going to find Frances."

The horror of it all was starting to get to Frank. His respiration increased, and he fidgeted nervously. "I can… of course I'll stay," he promised.

"Good," Alex said. "I'll call to check in on him later." She touched Bobby's hand, nodded to Frank, and hurried out.

* * *

Logan and Eames were being led around the scene by Detective Miles. "We found blood here," he said, "but we couldn't find the damn weapon for anything. Then I stopped to think for a minute and I saw this…" he walked over and gestured to a little row of rounded metal posts that were situated to prevent people from parking too close to the back door of a business. Each post was about six inches in diameter, and about four feet high. The third one in had been cut open with a saw. "There was a hole in this one, and the guy must have dropped it inside." Miles paused as the two Major Case detectives looked at everything. "Everything came back from trace. It's your partner's blood," he told Eames.

"You're canvassing these buildings?" Logan asked.

"Yeah. The apartment we found him in is just over there. We keep talking, we'll find somebody who saw something."

Logan nodded and looked over at Alex. "You got eyes on the hospital, too, right?"

"Eyes and ears."

Logan nodded again. "They were keeping him for something. They've got his Mom. They're not finished. Either she's gonna show up again or somebody's gonna make a move on him."

"I agree." Alex asked Miles for the names of the detectives in charge of watching over Bobby. She and Logan walked a few paces, arm to arm. "She has an accomplice. I'd bet that's who took Bobby. Probably male. I can't think of a female strong enough to take him down like that."

"And Wallace is with his mother?"

"I'd bet on it." She stopped and looked at Logan. "I want to find out how much of that night they've retraced. You check in with Bobby's security team?"

"Gotcha."

"I'll call you."

Logan nodded and headed for the car.

* * *

Frank's hands were shaking. In fact, he felt like every bit of him was shaking.

It was a familiar feeling. He'd gone cold turkey before. He scratched the most annoying places and paced the hospital room. It seemed to be getting smaller with every lap he made around the perimeter.

Bobby had come around once since Frank's arrival, but he didn't seem to even recognize him. He hadn't seen Bobby in two years, but that didn't make it any less painful to see him in a hospital bed. Frank was worried. And to top it off, he kept thinking of his mother. He hadn't seen her in a year. He'd dropped in thinking he could have a nice chat, maybe appeal to her maternal instincts and get a few bucks to help him out of the jam he was in. But she had been raving that day. First she was all sweet and hugs and then all of a sudden she was out of her mind, blaming him for things he'd never even imagined his father had done and telling him he was going straight to hell. Frank had high-tailed it out and hadn't found the time to make it back.

But now she was kidnapped, and he couldn't imagine how scared she must be. He scraped a hand over his shoulder and continued pacing.

"Frank?" A surprised whisper came from the hospital bed.

He spun around quickly. "Bobby, man, how you feeling?"

Bobby tried to focus his eyes on his brother, but either the concussion or the strangeness of it was making it hard. "Where'd you come from?" he managed to say, though some of the sounds weren't very clear.

"Your… uh, police buddies found me. Brought me here to see you."

"Why?" Bobby mouthed, but by good fortune, no sound came out. His foggy mind answered his question for him. They wouldn't have called in his family unless he wasn't doing well. Alex wouldn't have called in Frank. Not if he was okay. Bobby's heart rate increased.

"I, uh, I told your friend, uhm… your partner that I'd stay with you. I know you don't like being alone."

Bobby's bruised brain tried to make sense of this. "Eames," he said quietly.

"Yeah, yeah, her. Eames."

"Where's she?" Bobby asked, and squeezed his eyes shut. The headache was getting worse, and he felt sick again.

"Looking for Ma."

"She's at the home," Bobby drawled. He was really struggling to understand what was going on. He turned his head, and immediately regretted it.

The nurse appeared and made an adjustment to his IV. "What's going on?" She asked, just as Bobby started dry-heaving.

"He was just awake, that's all. He doesn't sound right."

The nurse comforted Bobby until he grew still again. Then she checked his pupils and all of his vitals again.

"Why's he… why can't he talk?"

"He can't talk?" She asked Frank.

"He doesn't sound right. His speech is distorted, and slurred."

"That's because of the swelling," she said. "As it goes down, he will improve."

"Is it? Going down?"

The woman gave him a sad look and shrugged. "I can tell you it's not any worse," was all she said. She made a final adjustment to Bobby's IV and left Frank alone with his brother.

Bobby was unconscious again. Frank folded his arms and scratched himself roughly. Then he raked a hand through his hair again and paced the room once more, a little quicker this time than the last.

Bobby didn't know about their mother. He didn't know what was going on.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Bobby had left the 1-7 wearing a wire and hadn't turned it on until he was two blocks from where he was assaulted. Then, for some reason, the thing malfunctioned. The only recording they had was of Bobby's heavy breathing as he walked quickly, or maybe even jogged, down the block. There was one strange voice on the recording. The man said, "She sent me for you."

"Tell her to make an appointment." Bobby's voice was steady, calculating.

"She says you'll want to talk now."

"She's wrong."

"She says she can help you with a cold case." There were no more words after that, just wind and rustling, and the device cut out.

"You tell me, Detective. What cold case would have made him take a risk like that?"

"She is a cold case," Alex breathed. "She's responsible for at least 4 unsolved cases we know of. There are bound to be more."

"All the more reason to follow protocol," suggested Miles.

"Maybe," Alex said. If she was honest with herself, she knew there was a chance she herself wouldn't have waited for backup to go after Wallace. For she and Bobby, Nicole was at the top of their Most Wanted list. "So why did the mic cut out?"

"Tech thinks it was a fluke. A malfunction, plain and simple. That mic was brand new, never been used."

For a split second, Alex thought about suing the company that manufactured the mic. She let the thought go as soon as it had appeared.

"Take me back to the scene where you found him," she said.

The alley had been the site of Bobby's assault, but he had actually been found in an apartment the next building over. Except for Goren, the place had been unoccupied, though they had found enough evidence that someone had been with him. Trace had been unable to detect any DNA evidence as of yet. The perp must have been gloved.

Miles peeled back the crime scene tape and they both logged in on the paper inside the door. Alex glanced around and saw the dirty couch she'd been told he'd been on. She imagined him there, his feet hanging off the end, his injured head cocked uncomfortably against the arm of the old couch.

It was too much for a moment. She quietly raised a fist to her mouth and pretended to wipe something away. Alex bit her lip and gathered her composure. She walked the scene, mentally cataloging everything she saw, and asking questions of Miles.

He'd done his homework. They had nothing unless they got something back from trace.

* * *

"Roll it back again," Logan said, pointing to something in the surveillance video from the hospital. "That guy. He's shown up twice today." Logan turned to the officer at his side. "Did he talk to anybody?"

"I don't know. I didn't even notice him, probably since he didn't come in."

"He's hovering. Find out if he talked to somebody. If he didn't, he probably doesn't have a reason to be here."

* * *

"Frank," Bobby said again.

"Whattaya want, Bro?" Frank asked him.

Bobby licked his dry lips and swallowed. "Thirsty," he said clearly.

"Oh, uh… okay." Frank rooted on the bedside table and dropped a straw into the cup he himself had been drinking out of. He bent the tip and held it to his brother's lips.

Bobby sucked in several times and then choked on it. He coughed and squeezed his eyes shut against the pain in his head.

"You okay?" Frank asked him.

Bobby nodded, his expression anything but okay. "This is… ICU," he said to Frank.

"Yeah, they're keeping an eye on you."

"Eames said…" Bobby's mind swirled as he tried to get hold of the memory. "Where's Eames?"

"She's uh… working," Frank said.

"Ma," Bobby muttered. "You said something about Ma. Before."

"You sound better. You feeling better now, Bobby?"

"You're avoiding the question."

"What question?"

"Where's Eames?"

"She said she's going to find Ma."

"Where's Ma?"

Frank scratched his head impatiently. "If I knew that, I guess Eames wouldn't be looking for her, right, Bobby?"

Bobby was getting aggravated. His stomach was in a knot, and he could feel the headache building in intensity again. "Not a fucking joke, Frank."

"I know it's not!"

"Where's Ma?!"

"Jesus, Bobby, you're getting all upset."

"Where the fuck—?"

"She's missing, okay? She's not at the home."

Bobby blinked and tried to think past the pounding in his head. This didn't make sense. Frank was playing some kind of a joke. He forced himself up on one elbow and grabbed Frank's shirt with his other hand.

"Where's Ma?!" Bobby demanded.

"Jesus, Bobby!" Frank cried, and the nurse scurried into the room and set to work right away trying to calm her patient.

"You're fucking with me," Bobby said over and over as the nurse's hands settled him back against the pillow.

"No, Bobby, I'm not."

"Do you think you can just drop it for a minute, the both of you?" The nurse snapped at them. She looked at Bobby sternly. "You need to relax." And she turned to Frank. "And you need to take a walk or something. The last thing he needs right now is to get so upset."

"No, no, wait," Bobby protested, as Frank stomped out of the room. With a heavy sigh, his head sank against the pillow. "Eames," Bobby whispered, wishing she was with him.

"Relax," the nurse told him again. She checked his vitals and made an adjustment to his medication.

"C-can I make a c-call?" Bobby asked.

"As long as it's not to him," she told him, tipping her head in the direction Frank had gone. The nurse helped him get hold of the old push-button phone that came complimentary with every hospital stay.

Bobby dialed four numbers and paused. He closed his eyes, trying to picture the number combination he needed. He hung up and tried twice more, but each time he forgot the number before he got to the end. With a heavy sigh he handed it back to the nurse.

"Can't remember?" She asked him, and he nodded.

"Maybe I can help. Who were you calling?"

"Eames," he said. "Alex Eames."


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

He tucked the phone between his head and the pillow as best he could. "Eames," she barked, in that busy tone she had. Bobby felt a little better, just hearing the sound of her voice.

Alex was about to speak again, it was taking so long for the person on the other end to speak. When she heard him say her name, she broke into a smile. "Hi, Bobby," she told him, her voice softer.

"Hi," he replied.

"Is something wrong?" Alex asked.

"Frank… Frank said…" Bobby closed his eyes against the headache and tried to start over. "Where's my Mom?"

Alex's smile disappeared. She raised a hand and pressed her fingers against her eyes. "I'm trying to find her, Bobby. Logan is working with me."

"It's true, then?"

"Look, Bobby, I'm on my way over there. I'm going to check in with Logan and then I'm coming to see you. Can we talk in person?"

"Eames, it's Nicole. She has my Mom." Bobby wasn't sure what made the image of Wallace pop into his head, but he knew without a doubt that she was behind it.

"I know. I'll find her, Bobby." Alex sighed. "Is Frank there? I'd like to talk to him."

"He left."

Alex suppressed her anger. "I'll be there soon, Bobby. Try not to worry, okay?"

"Okay," he said quietly, but it wasn't convincing.

"Bye."

"Bye." Bobby reached out and pushed the button down to end the call. Then he slowly replaced the handset in the cradle. He turned carefully to one side. His stomach was churning again.

* * *

By the time she got back to him, he was off everything but the oxygen. His head was elevated in the bed, and though he sat in the darkened room with his eyes closed, he was awake.

Alex came forward and took his hand, and Bobby opened his eyes. For a moment, neither said a word, just studied each other with a stare. "How's the head?" she asked him.

He closed his eyes and shook his head.

"Well, you certainly look better," she told him.

"Where's Ma?" he asked.

Alex sighed. "Okay. Nicole showed up at Carmel Ridge with paperwork saying she's married to you. She checked her out."

"Ma believed her?"

"Nobody knows your Mom's side of things yet, Bobby. We suspect Nicole is still upstate with your Mom, and her accomplice is back here casing you."

"She's not done with me."

"No. So Logan has been working with the security detail and we just got a pretty good image of a person of interest. Once we catch him, he'll lead us to Nicole." She watched Bobby shut his eyes and take a deep breath. "What happened to Frank?" she asked.

"I don't know, he left."

"He didn't say anything?"

"We had an argument and the nurse asked him to take a walk, and so he did."

"Oh, Bobby. I'm sorry."

Bobby shrugged one shoulder. He thought of things he could say, excuses he could make for Frank's behavior, but instead, he said nothing. "You must have thought I was dying," Bobby told her.

"What? No."

"…all the effort to find him and bring him here…"

"I just thought your family should know. And, no, you weren't doing well at the time." She squeezed his hand. "But look at you now," she said, and smiled.

His eyes closed again, and he took another deep breath. Bobby gave her hand a squeeze. "I'm glad you're here," he said.

"I'm here until we get a break in the case," she told him.

"Did you go to Carmel Ridge?"

"I'm not telling you any more, Bobby. You need to rest. Just trust me, okay? I'm taking care of things."

He frowned, but he didn't ask any more questions. Instead, he thought about how nice her hand felt in his.

* * *

"Aren't you tired?" Nicole asked.

"No. Are you?"

The woman smiled. "I've always been a night owl," she said.

"It would be nice if you could bring me a copy of the paper."

"You didn't take your medicine, did you?" Nicole asked. "You cheeked it."

"Don't be ridiculous! You saw me take the pills."

"No, you must have cheeked them. Where are they? In your purse?" Nicole strode across the room and took Frances' purse from her bedside table. As she unzipped it and began to look, the old woman tried to snatch it from her hands.

"Don't you know a purse is personal and private?! God, you are atrocious."

Nicole easily yanked the object away. Plunging her hand inside, she withdrew a pill bottle and shook it. "It's empty. What did you…?!" She grabbed another prescription bottle and found it empty, too. "You got rid of them all?!" She found the same with a third bottle.

"I don't like them. They make me tired."

"Is that so? Well, you'd better watch yourself, Mrs. Goren. I don't like to be annoyed, and I'm sure I can find another way to put you to sleep."

"What? All that kindness was just an act? I'm shocked." Her voice was dripping with sarcasm. "What do you want with my son, anyway?"

"Bobby's a dear old friend," Nicole replied, distracted by a text on her cell phone.

"You're the last woman on earth Bobby would be friends with."

Nicole replied to the text and then smiled at Frances. "I don't know… we do have quite a lot in common. Gloomy childhoods, for one."

Frances railed at her, and Nicole moved out of the woman's reach. She checked the trash can. "What did you do with them? Flush them down the toilet?"

Mrs. Goren shrugged. "Maybe I spiked your drink at dinner."

Nicole produced a bright smile. "You are a dear, aren't you?"

* * *

"How is he?"

"Asleep, finally. He's a lot better, Mike. He even ate something for the first time. But he's worried about his Mom. And he's still got the headache."

"Our POI hasn't made another appearance yet. Guy at the coffee stand outside gave us a pretty detailed description, though. He's gonna keep an eye out." Logan paused and looked her over. "You look beat," he said. "You eat anything?"

"No, but I need to."

"The security guys all have me on speed dial. He's sleeping, it's a good time for you to slip away."

Alex nodded and followed Mike to the cafeteria.

* * *

Bobby awoke as they moved him from ICU. He asked about Eames, but the staff wasn't sure where she'd gone. He tried to shove away his uneasy feelings and simply cooperate with the move.

He thought about his mother again, and about Nicole. Bobby was furious. Whatever Nicole wanted from him, there was no reason to put his mother in the middle of it. She wasn't playing fair, and this wasn't a game of tit for tat anymore. He needed her to make contact with him, so he could find his Mom.

The aide who stayed back to position the bed for him was tall and strong. His bangs hung down over his eyes, and he had a beard. Bobby glanced at him again. There was something familiar about him.

* * *

Logan checked his text message. "They're moving him to a regular room," he told Alex. "No sign of our POI, just hospital staff."

At first she was going to jump up and leave her dinner to go check on him, but Mike's report was reassuring. Alex looked down at her plate and took another bite.

* * *

"I know you," Bobby told him.

The man kept his head low. "No you don't."

"I want to talk to her."

The head looked up for a moment. "Too much risk," the man replied.

"I know how to get around them."

"You're a patient."

"I'll check myself out AMA. I'm all right now."

"You're on oxygen."

Bobby reached up and removed the tube. The disguised man in front of him sratched the back of his hand, thinking. "You'll have to do it now. I can't take the risk that you'll hatch some kind of plan with your cop friends later."

Bobby pushed himself upright, holding his hands against the mattress while the room swayed a little. The throbbing in his head got stronger.

With a deep breath, Bobby dropped his feet to the floor and stood. The man handed him a plastic bag full of his clothes, and Bobby put them on.

He paused at the nurse's desk and quietly signed the paperwork. Then Bobby Goren walked out.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

He had to concentrate when he was walking. He felt very unsettled, and like he could lose his balance at any time. Bobby led the way out the hospital doors, ignoring the protest of the nurse on his new floor. Once outside, he let the other man take the lead. They walked to the parking lot and the man opened the passenger door for him.

Bobby carefully lowered himself into the seat. Then he closed his eyes around the throbbing in his head and tried to put together his thoughts.

"She's promised you something," Bobby said. "Something big. Irresistable."

The man nodded. "Apparently you're worth a lot of money to her."

"And sex. She's promised you that, too."

"She gives me that for free."

Bobby shook his head. Without the concussion, he might have smiled. "Nicole doesn't give anything for free." He took a deep breath. He was having trouble putting his words together. "I've known Nicole for a long time. She's promised a lot of people a lot of things, and in the end… This can't work out well for you."

"I can take care of myself."

"Think about… how easily you incapacitated me. She can kill with a jab of a needle just as easily. She has killed that way."

The man behind the wheel was very quiet as he thought over Goren's words.

* * *

Alex's phone rang. "Eames," she said.

"Detective Eames, I'm sorry to bother you. I'm Leia from the ICU unit. Did you know Mr. Goren checked himself out?"

Alex got to her feet. "What?!"

"He was transferred downstairs and the next thing you know he'd signed out AMA."

"What floor was he on? I'll be right there." She glared at Logan and told him the news as they sprinted out of the cafeteria, leaving their unfinished food on the table.

Logan leaned on the security team while Eames interviewed the hospital staff. She got a good description, and Mike found the man on the surveillance tapes. "It's him," Mike said. "Same guy. Just with a wig and a beard. See how he walks?"

The security officer was embarrassed. Mike told him to print out stills of the man and hand deliver them to him. He walked over to join Eames.

She held out the paper for Logan to see. "It's his handwriting. He did check himself out."

"He didn't look like he was coerced on the video. No sign of a weapon."

"They've got his mother, Mike. She's all Bobby can think about."

* * *

By the time they checked into a hotel room, Bobby could barely stay on his feet. He lowered himself to a bed and held his pounding head between his hands. "You're not gonna jab me again, are you?" He asked. "I mean, I'm here of my own will. There's no need…"

"Long as you don't try anything," his captor said.

"Good," Bobby breathed. He dropped his hands and fell asleep.

* * *

Frances Goren had kept Nicole awake all night. It was amusing at first. The old woman said she was plotting ways to kill her. By three in the morning, Nicole was tired of the game. She warned Frances not to try her patience, and she locked her into her room to get a few hours of shuteye.

Now, Nicole wore dark glasses to hide the bags under her eyes. She towed Frances along with her to a pharmacy, prescription bottles in hand.

"I need to get these refilled for my mother-in-law," she said. "In a fit of rage, she dumped them into the toilet and flushed them down last night."

"She's keeping my against my will!" Frances cried. "She's abducted me!"

"You can see how badly she needs them. I'm afraid she'll become violent." Nicole said to the pharmacist. The man turned the bottle over in his hand and went to make the call.

He returned with a frown on his face. "I couldn't get through to the prescribing physician. The best I can do is give you a few samples. You'll have to get him to call in the refill before I can fill it for you."

"Thank you," Nicole said, flashing her brightest smile. She took the little bag of samples and tugged Mrs. Goren along with her, back to the car.

* * *

"What's your name?" Bobby asked. He hadn't slept long. The sound of the television had long since invaded his quiet thoughts.

"Huh?"

"Your name. It'd be nice to know what to call you."

"Howard."

"Nice to meet you, Howard."

Nicole's accomplice grunted.

"What do you know about her, anyway?"

Howard looked at Goren and shrugged. "She's from Australia. She's underappreciated. Smart as hell."

"Yeah, you got that one right."

"Hell of a good lay."

"So I've heard, from both teams."

Howard looked at Goren in surprise.

"Oh. She didn't tell you she likes to play around? Yeah, girls, boys, it doesn't matter to Nicole, so long as she gets what she wants out of it." Bobby's head was starting to throb again. It was difficult to keep up the conversation, but he was doing it to save the man's life.

"Whatever. Now she's into me."

"Key word there is 'now.'"

"Look, it's not really your business, anyway."

"Howard, Howard," Bobby intoned. "I've known Nicole a long time. I bet I know her more intimately than anyone else in her life. That woman is all about herself. She can fool you, she can make you think you're the center of the universe. She's smart, like you said. She can read you like a book, Howard. Like the fact that you're barely scraping by on the income from that last job."

Howard's head jerked up at Goren.

"Your shoes, Howard. You need a new pair. Or at least a new pair of laces. They're knotted together in the middle of the tongue."

"I hate to buy shoes," Howard mumbled.

"And if I could notice it so easily, you know Nicole… smart, sexy Nicole could. You're an easy target, Howard. Down on your luck, lonely. I bet she could get you to do anything."

"Shut up."

"You damned near killed a cop for her. You know what you would have gotten if you'd killed me?"

"Shut up, I said!"

"And the sad thing is, Howard… you're on a suicide mission right now. For you, this story only has one end. Nicole is going to use you. And when she's done with you, she'll kill you."

Howard got up and grabbed a desk lamp in his hands. He held it in the air, threatening to swing it like a bat. "I said shut the hell up, okay?!"

Bobby did as he said. His head was killing him, anyway. "Okay, okay. I'm sorry. I just… I don't want anyone else to die, Howard." Bobby took his time to lay down on his bed. He rolled to his right side and drew up his knees. "I'll shut up," he added.

Howard slowly set the lamp down. He looked at the helpless man on the bed and ran his hand along his hairline. He stuffed his hand in his pocket, checked for the room key and his phone, and stepped outside.

* * *

"Take the bloody pills," ordered Nicole.

"You can't force me to."

"Maybe you'd like to see your precious boy again?" Nicole said with a sickening grin. "One call to my partner and he's a dead man."

"You don't have Bobby. If you had Bobby you wouldn't need me."

They heard the chime of an incoming text. Nicole smiled at the message and quickly typed her response. In another moment, she was sent a picture of Bobby Goren's face, asleep against an ugly hotel comforter. Nicole grinned and showed the picture to the old woman. "Now, if you don't want me to hurt Bobby… take the pills."

Frances scowled at Wallace. In aggravation, she opened the bubble packages one by one and swallowed down her medication. "Don't you touch him," she warned.

"Oh, dear lady," Nicole told her, "I'm hoping he'll want to touch me."


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

It was finally still and quiet in the room, and Bobby found himself awake. He got to his feet and stumbled in the dark to the restroom. Then he silently walked over to Howard and searched the man and his possessions with his eyes.

Howard was asleep in the bed, but he'd left his pants in a heap on the floor. Bobby bent over to pick them up and was nearly floored by a wave of dizziness. He grasped the nightstand with his hand until everything stopped moving. Then he checked that Howard was still sleeping before picking up the pants.

The cell phone was in his pocket. Bobby quickly looked up the texts from the day and easily picked out Nicole's number. He repeated it a few times in his head to memorize it. Then he slipped quietly out of the room.

Eames' number came to him this time, and he'd never been so glad to hear her sleepy voice.

"Eames," she growled into the phone.

"Hey," Bobby said quietly.

"Bobby, what the hell?! Are you okay? Where are you? Are you with her?!"

"N-no, I'm okay. I'm with Howard."

"Howard?"

"The guy who hit me… before."

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I guess. Look, I don't have much time. He's gonna know I'm gone." Bobby looked up and down the hall. "Write this down. 555-9057."

Alex repeated the number to him. "Got it. Who is it?"

"Nicole."

Cold chills shot up Alex's spine. "What are you planning, Goren? You have to get out of there."

"I have to get Ma, first," he said. "Look, don't call her, but trace it. At least it should get you close."

"Bobby, get the hell out of there while you can. We can find her, especially now, with the number."

"I'm counting on that," he said, and hung up. He snuck back into the room and replaced the phone in the pocket where they'd been before. Then he sat in the chair and waited.

* * *

Alex sent the incoming number from Howard's phone and the number that Bobby said was Nicole's off to be traced. She wanted to be angry with him, but she knew he was worried about his mom. And the truth was, Alex was too worried about Bobby to be angry. At least he still sounded okay. Maybe the hospital stay had been long enough. Maybe he was still on the mend.

"Logan," Mike said.

"You awake?"

"I am now."

"We're going back upstate. I'll pick you up in ten."

"I'll be ready."

* * *

"You had my phone," Howard said, scowling.

Bobby was still in the chair, but he had fallen asleep. Howard's voice roused him. He raised his head and wiped his face on his arm. "Yeah," Bobby said.

"I guess that means I can't trust you."

"Time…" Bobby muttered. His head was foggy. "Check the time."

Howard looked at his cell phone again and saw that the call Bobby had placed was hours before.

"Could have arrested you by now," Bobby explained.

"Or maybe you're setting a trap."

"Nicole… Nicole is setting the trap. For you."

"Goddammit!" Howard exclaimed. He got up and paced the room angrily.

"Just walk away," Bobby told him. "Leave me here and walk away."

"She'll come for you."

"I know that."

"You're not afraid?"

"She has my mother."

Howard looked at Goren with a kind of respect. "She said you would do anything for her. I guess Nicole knows you as well as you know her."

Bobby leaned forward and put his head in his hands.

"Look, you must be hungry. I'll go get us a bite. Stay here." Howard left and Bobby staggered over to lay on his bed.

* * *

After all the hours of chatter, Frances Goren was ominously silent. She sat beside Wallace in the car, a new one, a rental, and stared at her.

"You're certainly persistent," Nicole said, glancing at the woman. She had been putting up with the staring since they'd gotten the car, 45 minutes ago.

Frances' mind was racing, but she kept her thoughts to herself. Nicole had Bobby. From the looks of the photo, he was incapacitated. While Frances had thought of a hundred ways to hurt Nicole, to cause the car to crash, she couldn't follow through because of Bobby. She didn't know where he was, or if he was hurt.

So she stared at Nicole Wallace. Venomously, she stared.

* * *

Logan and Eames arrived at the apartment only to find it empty. Nicole, in true form, had left a note behind for Eames.

_Hide and seek! Be sure and count to ten before you come looking for me._

Alex frowned and set the note aside. They scoured the apartment, and Mike came up with an empty prescription bottle.

"Frances Goren," he read. "Risperdal." He looked over at Alex. "I'm thinking she might need this one."

"Antipsychotic," Alex said. "If we're lucky she fed the pills to Nicole." They shared a quiet grin at her humor and continued with their work.

"If Frances emptied her pills herself, Nicole may have wanted to refill them," Mike suggested.

Alex nodded and gave him a knowing look. "Let's check the pharmacies."

* * *

"I only gave her a few samples, enough for three days, tops. I told her she had to call the woman's physician."

"Did you see anything else? What kind of car she was driving, maybe?"

The car description sounded like the same vehicle she'd been in days before. Alex frowned. She wondered why no one locally had caught it. "She can't stay in that vehicle much longer," she told Logan. "Nicole knows we're on to her."

He nodded and they hurried out to check the rental companies.

* * *

Bobby ate breakfast and immediately regretted it. His headache was worse and his stomach was churning. He didn't even try to talk to Howard much.

"Look, I've been thinking about what you said… about Nicole and her plans for me…"

Bobby still held his hand against his cheek as he lifted his head to listen.

"I've been thinking, and it's not worth it. I'm not going to stick around for her to come back."

"Wise decision," Bobby mumbled.

"But I don't think you should, either. I mean, she's got your mother, but chances are, she's already dead. I could never figure out what she was planning to do with her, anyway."

"Nicole won't kill her until she gets what she wants from me."

"Look, you know she's gonna show up here. Just, you know, ambush her."

Bobby allowed his head a gentle nod. He cleared his throat. "Call Nicole. Tell her to come for me."

"She's already on her way." The two men frowned at each other a moment, and then Howard gathered up his things and left.

Bobby barely made it to the toilet before he threw up.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

"Trouble in paradise?" Frances prodded. She'd noticed Nicole checking for text messages and finding none.

Nicole shrugged the old woman off and pulled into a gas station. She was clearly unhappy, but she threw on a fresh smile. "Time to freshen up." Nicole got out of the car, sweet talked the man in the next car into pumping her gas for her, and then walked around to escort Frances inside.

Mrs. Goren had her moment. She could have escaped easily, here, at a gas station in the city, but she knew Nicole had Bobby. She didn't even try.

* * *

Bobby found a room key and made his way down to the lobby. He felt terrible, but he knew if he gave Eames his location, she would whisk him off to a hospital before he found out about his mother.

"Do you have the time?" Bobby asked a man in the lobby, who he'd already noticed had no watch. The guy pulled out his cell phone and rattled off the time. "That's a nice phone," Goren said. "Newer than mine." He made small talk about the phone and then made like he was going to get his out. He searched his pockets frantically. "Oh, hell," Bobby muttered, and now his new friend was worried about him. "I must have lost it on the train. Oh, no."

The guy offered some suggestions for finding it and Bobby thanked him. "Look, uh, it's not a big deal, but I really need to call my wife. She wanted me to check in with her. Do you mind?" Bobby asked, holding his hand in the air. The guy handed over his cell, and Bobby thanked him. "It'll be quick, I promise. I'll just…" Bobby walked two paces away and dialed Eames.

"Eames," she said.

"Hey."

"Bobby, where the hell are you?"

"I'm okay. I'm alone now. I convinced Howard not to trust Nicole."

"Bobby, you've got to tell me where you are."

"Not yet, Alex. I have to get Ma first. Look, I'm on a guy's phone. I have to give it back. I'll see you around."

"Bobby—" Alex started to say, but he ended the call.

"That was Goren?" Mike asked.

"Yeah."

"Get a trace?"

She shook her head. "He borrowed a phone from a passer-by. It would be a dead end."

"What, then…?" Mike asked, knowing the wheels were already turning behind her eyes.

"We find Howard."

"He's with him?"

"No, but he knows where Bobby is."

* * *

Bobby took a shower. It had been days, and he thought it would make him more alert. Just cleaning up was taxing for him, and when he got out, he pulled his clothes back on and dropped onto the bed. He closed his eyes against the throbbing in his head, and after a while, he fell asleep.

* * *

Bobby stirred when the door opened. He was fully awake by the time his mother grabbed his hand. He sat up, looking into her eyes and silently asking if she was all right.

Frances nodded at him, touched the trickle of blood on the back of his neck, and asked him the same silent question.

Bobby seemed surprised by the blood. He rubbed some of it off, and nodded to his mother. Then he turned to Nicole. "Well, you've got me," Bobby told her. "What do you want?"

Nicole smiled. "Bobby… not in front of your mother."

He got to his feet, trying hard not to sway. "Anything you want to say to me, you can say in front of her."

"Oh, I'm sorry. I'd be too… embarrassed to speak of it in front of your dear old mum." Nicole produced a syringe from her pocket, and Bobby pushed Frances behind him protectively.

"No, don't do that," he told Nicole. "Just. We'll leave her here. You and I, we'll go somewhere and talk. She won't try anything, will you Ma?"

"Not so long as she's with you," Frances admitted.

Bobby turned back to Nicole, who slowly lowered the syringe. She opened the room door and after a silent goodbye to his mother, Bobby followed her out.

Frances picked up the hotel phone, only to find it wasn't working. Someone had severed the connection.

* * *

Sweat gathered in a mist on Bobby's forehead as he tried to keep up the appearance of normalcy. He felt like his thinking was slow, and he had to concentrate more and more to keep his feet under him. The nausea never had gone away. He sat down across from Nicole at a booth in the hotel bar and allowed her to order a drink for him.

"What do you want, Nicole?" Bobby growled at her.

"Oh, Bobby… I so hadn't pictured things this way."

Bobby scowled. "No, you pictured me completely incapacitated while you kidnapped my mother…" his words were clipped. He was very angry.

"I've given a lot of thought to this," Nicole said. "There's only one man I would want to father my child."

His stomach lurched. "You can't be serious."

"I'm ready to move into the next phase of my life."

"I'm not gonna…"

"Oh, relax, Bobby, I'm not asking you to… perform the _act_. Just make a little donation. I'll take care of the rest."

"And if I say no?"

"Your mother's health is somewhat fragile, isn't it?"

He rolled his eyes and scowled again. The only way out of this mess was logic. Nicole was very determined once she'd made up her mind. There was only one way to get through to her. "There's a reason I've never had children," he said.

"Waiting for Mrs. Right?" Nicole teased. Their drinks came, and she took a sip of hers.

Bobby took a deep breath and thought carefully about how to put his words together. "You've spent some time with my mother," he said.

"She's delightful. You take after her, you know."

"Delightful," he scoffed. "You know she's schizophrenic."

"Nobody's perfect."

"You want your child to have that?"

"The odds are only 13 percent if one of the parents has it. Much less with a grandparent, I should think."

"You've done research."

"So have you."

"I've done enough research to know that even a 1 percent chance is too much risk for me."

"Even if you don't have to raise it? This is a sperm donation, Bobby, nothing more. I will never come to you for anything more."

"And you think I could live with that?"

"Oh, yes, your sense of responsibility. It's a sample in a cup or your mother's life. Where is your responsibility in that, hmmm?"

He was growing paler by the minute. He wiped his hand through his curly hair and scratched his beard. Bobby nodded. "All right. Okay. But I don't want you near my mother."


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

"What did you do with Howard?" Nicole asked.

"He left." Bobby ignored the drink she'd purchased and sipped from the water glass on the table.

"Probably straight to your little sidekick."

_I hope so, _Bobby thought. "He figured out your plans weren't in his best interest," Bobby said.

Nicole's mind was working fast. If Howard had run to Eames, then this hotel was compromised. She dropped a twenty dollar bill on the table. "Last chance for that drink. We have an appointment to keep."

Bobby pushed himself up with his hands and had to pause a moment to keep things from swirling. Nicole noticed his weakness. They went back upstairs to the bedroom and found Frances sitting stiffly in a chair awaiting their return. Bobby's expression was grim, and the old woman's instincts told her to stay alert.

"Let's go," Nicole said sharply, reaching for Frances' arm. Bobby wedged himself between them.

Holding Nicole's hand out of reach of his mother, he said, "We have a deal, Nicole." He gave the blonde a look of warning, and she backed away. "Leave nothing behind," she told them, and led the way out.

"Up front, Bobby," Nicole told him. He had already helped his mother into the back, and reluctantly he closed the back door and opened the front to get in.

Bobby had a hard time finding a comfortable way to rest his head. It seemed no matter what part touched the seat back, it hurt. His mother's hand snaked its way in to his curls. She found the stitches he'd received in the hospital, and slid her hand down to touch the back of his neck. He leaned against her fingers for a moment, in appreciation of the gesture.

He could have overpowered Nicole, caused her to flip the wheel into traffic… but he was afraid an accident would hurt his mother. Bobby leaned against his mother's hand and poured everything he had into the struggle to keep out of the swirling fog that seemed to be gathering in his brain.

* * *

"God damn it!" Alex exclaimed in frustration. Howard had given them the location, and now in the room, all they found was rumpled sheets and a wadded note that Frances had written in a shaky hand.

Alex read the note. Frances Goren told them that Nicole was alone with them both, and that Bobby wasn't well.

"Eames," Mike said, holding back the comforter with a gloved hand. There was blood on the pillowcase.

Alex was exhausted. The combination of the work and the worry was taking its toll. She knew the blood was Bobby's. She was sick to her stomach, just thinking about him. "All right, let's leave this to the CSU guys and start canvassing the hotel."

Mike nodded and followed her out, pausing to put his wadded up gloves into the gloved hands of one of the CSU team on the way out.

* * *

"He's getting worse," Alex said, watching the clip of video from a tourist's phone that showed Bobby and Frances getting into Nicole's car in the background. "See how he holds onto the roof of the car as he gets in? He never has to do that."

Mike frowned. "At least they're both still alive."

Alex gave a grim nod. "Yeah."

"I got a partial plate from that still photo."

"Let's move," Alex said. Within minutes, they were on the computer tracking it down.

* * *

"Ma, do you remember that time Frankie made the volcano in school?" Bobby said suddenly.

Frances' eyebrow raised for a moment. It sounded like an innocent story, but the night Bobby referred to had been a horrible night. Frank had made a volcano for a science project at school, and Bill, her husband, had come home in a drunken rage after losing at the track.

He'd seen the volcano, and demanded to know who had left the garbage on the table. Frank, only 10 years old at the time, had closed his little fists and stood staring angrily at his father. Bill hadn't liked it. He had grabbed Frank by the arm and yelled at him until Frank yelled back.

Bobby, 6 years old, had watched in terror. Frances had tried everything to intervene, from pulling at her husband's clothes to raising her voice, to trying to send the kids to their rooms.

Bill had ignored her. Frank had raised his voice to his father, and Bill smacked him. When Bobby saw his brother get hit, he charged at his father, knocking the man off-balance. Then Frances had grabbed both boys and gotten the hell out of there.

They'd spent the night at her mother's house, and gone home for the volcano project the next morning. Frank had to take it to school.

Frances nodded at her grown son, and thought about why he had mentioned it. It was a moment of teamwork. They were going to have to work together to get out of their current mess. "I remember," she told him.

Bobby let out a false laugh at the memory. "You know, I almost knocked the whole thing off the table and Dad almost grabbed me as I ran…"

"You always were faster than him," Frances said. She watched Bobby closely from her spot in the back seat.

"I probably couldn't beat him now," Bobby said. He was sending her a message. He wasn't well.

"Enough of the family reunion," Nicole said. "We're almost there."

Bobby looked over at Nicole and wondered how she was going to go about this. The more he thought, the more he realized she wasn't going to do it alone.

* * *

Bobby's anxiety grew as he realized it was taking everything he had to concentrate on two things: staying on his feet and blocking his mother from Nicole. "Go," he whispered to his mother, but she either didn't hear him or she ignored him.

As they arrived at the entry, Nicole rang the buzzer.

"Yeah?" said a male voice. Bobby wiped his face with the palm of his hand.

"DeAndre, I've come for a favor."

"Nikki? Anything for you, baby." He remotely unlocked the door and she showed Bobby the syringe in her hand.

"Run, Ma," Bobby whispered again, knowing this might be their last chance. His mother met his eyes with a hard stare and he knew her answer was no. He frowned and stayed between the two women as his mother walked in first.

"17-C," Nicole called out from behind the two of them. The group walked to the man's apartment, and Bobby rapped his knuckles on the door.

"Nikki!" The man said happily, swinging the door wide. He was shocked to see a little old lady and a very large man with her. His smile faded and he looked at Nicole with concern. "What you need, Baby?"

"DeAndre, we need a place to stay. Just for a day or so."

"Sure, Baby, come in." He stood aside and the three went in. His place was neat and roomy. Bobby kept one hand on his Mom's elbow, and hovered near the door. He knew Nicole had the syringe, and he kept an eye on her movements.

"This is Bobby, and his Mum, Frances. He's got to keep an eye on her, poor dear, she's gone off her medication again, and she can't be left alone."

"Oh," DeAndre grunted. He looked over his guests and gave Nicole a quick hug.

"DeAndre, can you… stay with Frances a moment? I need a word with Bobby."

"Okay," DeAndre replied.

Frances clung to Bobby, but he slowly peeled her fingers away and followed Nicole to the other room. She shut the door and held up a small, square package.

Bobby scoffed. "You're gonna watch?!"

"Wouldn't want you to provide me with some kind of a substitute," she said.

The dizziness and the nausea were becoming too much. He raked a hand through his hair. "What if I c-can't?"

"Oh, come now, Bobby. I'm sure you can just picture that petite little partner of yours and you'll be ready for anything." Nicole sat on the edge of the bed as if she were bored.

His mind was racing. He had to convince Nicole he was going along with her plan, but he had to get those deadly syringes away from her. She still kept her purse close beside her.

"M-maybe I could use some help…" he said, swallowing down the bile and letting his eyes drift down to her bosom.

A wicked grin crossed her face. "In DeAndre's room, with him just outside the door…? Bobby, I never knew… how exciting!"

Goren sat on the bed, as far from her as possible. He fumbled with his jeans. His fingers wouldn't cooperate.

Nicole realized he was having trouble. "My, you really do need help, don't you?"

"M-my head," he explained, gesturing to his stitches.

Nicole came closer, but she brought her purse with her. She set it on the bed beside him and dropped her hands to move his out of the way. She put her lips very close to his as she unbuttoned the top of his jeans. "He wasn't supposed to hurt you, Bobby."

He felt her hands against him. Bobby indulged her with a distracting kiss and his right hand folded over the handles of her handbag. He threw it, hard, against the window. Bobby had hoped the purse would break the window, but it hadn't. Tearing his lips away from hers, he shouted, "Ma! Now! Run!" and flipped Nicole over to restrain her on the bed.

DeAndre burst into the room, and Goren's world went black.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

Furious with her son, the old woman did exactly as he said. Frances Goren ran out the apartment door, down the stairs, and to the coffee joint next door.

Her experience with the pharmacist was still in her mind. She calmed herself and asked someone politely to use their phone and call her daughter.

Frances had Major Case's number memorized. Though she rarely caught Bobby there, she knew her message always got through. She called the squad and asked for Bobby's partner.

"Excuse me?" Asked the Detective who'd picked up the call.

"This is Frances Goren. I need to speak to Bobby's partner."

"She's not here, but I'll transfer you to the Captain." He punched the hold button and ran to the Captain's office. "Cap, Frances Goren on line 2."

"Mrs. Goren?" Ross asked, snatching up the phone. He signaled for someone to start a trace.

Frances kept her voice low and covered her mouth so no one could tell what she was saying. "I'm at a coffee shop. The apartment is next door. 17C. They've still got Bobby! Get someone here quickly!" Tears gathered in her eyes.

"Okay, Mrs. Goren. We're tracing your call now. Just stay on the line with me. Are you safe right now?"

"I think so."

"Fine. Stay where you are. I'll stay on the line with you until help arrives."

"He's hurt," she told the Captain.

"I know."

"She might kill him. She has a needle."

"Try not to worry. I know you're frightened, but help is on the way."

* * *

"Eames, we got him!" Mike shouted, holding up his phone. She ran with Mike to the car and the tires squealed as she pulled out into traffic.

Mike read the text to her with the address. Eames made a few turns, taking short cuts Mike didn't even know about. When they arrived, there were three units pulling onto the scene.

The senior officer reported to Eames as the SWAT members hurried past, doing their jobs. "We have a hostage situation in 17-C. The Super gave us the key, but it's too dangerous to break in. SWAT's setting up now. There's a sniper across the street. His mother's in the café over there, if you wanna talk to her."

Logan looked to Alex, and she shook her head. Not now. All she wanted to do was to get to Bobby and get him out of harm's way. She led the way into the building, and Mike trotted along behind her.

They got to the apartment door, and heard a negotiator trying to open up communication with someone inside.

"Look, I had nothing to do with this!" The man inside was shouting. "I don't know what's going on!"

"We need to speak to Nicole Wallace."

"I don't know where she is!"

"She was with you."

"She's gone! I swear, she's gone!"

"Who else is in the apartment with you?" the negotiator asked. "Detective Goren?"

"I don't know, is that his name? Detective? Shit! Some guy's here, he was attacking her and I hit him and I don't know, he might be dead!"

"Anyone else?"

"N-no, just me and the guy."

He looked over at Eames and they listened to the radio chatter. As best as SWAT could tell, from the visual of the sniper and the flexible camera they'd dropped in through the wall, it looked to be the truth.

"Okay, I want you to open the door slowly with your hands in clear sight. Slowly, now."

The knob turned, and the door swung open. Logan grabbed the man and cuffed him while Eames raced inside.

"Bobby?" she called, putting her hands on his neck to feel his pulse. Thankfully, he still had one. "We need a bus!" Eames shouted.

* * *

Eames was on her tail this time. Nicole had left as soon as Bobby fell unconscious. DeAndre hadn't even realized she'd gone because he was so concerned that he'd killed Bobby. Alex jogged out of the apartment and made her way to the back stairs. Mike followed her, and the two ran down the stairs, checking for evidence as they went.

"Get somebody to bag that!" she called, pointing at a square condom package on the floor. She ran right past it and Mike turned to be sure the uniforms following them had heard.

They also found a discarded purse shell by the back exit. She had been using one of those purses with the interchangeable covers. Alex pushed the door open and squinted at the bright light outside. The car was still out front, so Nicole was on foot.

The back alley was nice, kind of a patio for all of the businesses on the street. Each end was blocked and there was no motor traffic. Alex waved to Mike to cover one end while she checked the other.

Alex scanned every movement as she walked slowly down the alley. She checked every patio door. She noticed the purse. Lots of people have interchangeable purses, but it was enough to make her look more closely. Alex's eyes scanned upward. The body shape and height was correct. The hair was dark brown, but it was enough for her to move closer.

She walked up behind the woman, her right hand hovering near her weapon.

Nicole turned. Upon seeing Eames, she grabbed a rack of clothes, knocked it over in Eames' direction and ran. Eames hopped over the obstacle like a football player running tires. She had Nicole Wallace in her sight, and she was going to catch her.

Alex chased Nicole through the store and out the front door, where Nicole raced in the opposite direction of the still flashing lights on the cruisers. Alex ran hard, gaining ground with every stride.

Nicole was forced to turn at the corner to avoid being hit by a car. She stumbled, and that was all Alex Eames needed. Alex tackled her. Wallace landed hard on the rough sidewalk, earning an abrasion on her face.

Eames was scraped, too, but she was happy as hell to be able to Mirandize and cuff her longtime nemesis.

* * *

By the time Eames got there, Bobby had already been admitted. Fortunately, he wasn't in ICU this time. He was on his side in a room as dark and quiet as a hospital room can get.

Alex scratched at the adhesive bandage near her elbow. She'd had to endure an x-ray, but she had only bruised her elbow, not broken it. They'd bandaged her scrapes and sent her on her way.

Logan was already there. Alex had sent him to stay with Bobby while she was being examined.

"He woke once. Hard to understand him, but he was asking about his Mom."

"Did you tell him?"

"I told him she's okay, on her way back to Carmel Ridge. Ross brought her in to see him before she left."

"Was she…?"

"I didn't hang around. She started to cry, and I… I don't like to see women cry. Especially old women." Mike stood still as Alex put her hand on his arm. "Look, you need to get some sleep."

"I'll sleep here," Alex said. She sighed. "None of this seems real, you know? I need to be here… I need to…"

"Okay, all right," Mike said. He gestured to her arm. "Not broken?"

She gave him a smile and shook her head. "No, just bruised. It's gonna hurt for a few days."

"You should have been a linebacker."

"That's what my Dad always said," Alex joked.

"I'll see you around," Mike said. "Say hello to the big guy."

"I will. Thanks, Logan." She watched him walk out, and Alex sank into the visitor's chair beside Bobby's bed. She stared at him until she couldn't keep her eyes open any longer. Her head dipped to the side, and she slept.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

He thought he heard a lawn mower, then he realized that wasn't right. It didn't sound like a lawn mower. It sounded like… snoring. Bobby opened his eyes and tried to get them to focus.

It was Eames. He couldn't see her clearly, and the effort was bringing back the nausea. He closed his eyes and tried to speak instead. "Eames," he said. His voice sounded like thunder, even though it was no more than a whisper.

She tilted her head and the snoring stopped. "Alex," he said again. Alex stretched like a cat, and as soon as her mind was working, she sat up, two wide eyes focused on him.

"Bobby," she said, and got choked up.

He held out a hand, and she took it. "Can't leave you alone for a minute," she chastised him.

"Did you stop her?" Bobby asked, ignoring her humor. He stole a glance at her now and then, but mostly he kept his eyes shut.

"You could say that," Alex replied, rubbing her sore arm.

He saw her movement. Bobby's fingers drifted away from her hand and up to touch the edge of the bandage on Alex's arm. "You okay?" he asked.

"I'm okay." Alex took his hand back in hers again. "Nicole's in jail, Bobby. She's not going anywhere, with all the charges we've brought against her."

He closed his eyes again. "Mike said my Ma—"

"She's all right, Bobby. She's home by now."

Now it was his turn to gulp back tears. He took a deep breath and squeezed Alex's hand. "I had to," he explained.

"I know," she replied. "You can call her in the morning. I'm sure you'll both feel better." She watched him struggle to get comfortable. He tried to keep his eyes open again, but he gave up, closed them and raised his free hand to rub them hard.

"Just rest, Bobby. It's over now. We're all fine."

"S-stay with me?" he asked.

"Of course I will."

* * *

Eames was stiff as a board when she woke in the morning, and had her share of aches and pains, as well. Bobby was still sleeping, so she made her way to the restroom and found a cup of coffee on the way back.

She stared out his hospital window at the rainclouds that were trying their best to blot out the sunrise. Her phone rang, and she put it to her ear. "Eames," she said, and took a sip of her coffee.

"How is he?" Ross asked.

"Resting," she said. "And finally where he needs to be."

"Eames, there are some things we should ask him about."

"Sure. I'll ask him."

"Uhm… when the medics arrived, his pants were unfastened. There was that unopened condom you saw in the stairwell."

Alex felt her gut clench. "It must be what Nicole wanted from him." She closed her eyes for a moment. "I'll ask him about it, Captain. What is she saying?"

"Consensual."

"He wouldn't."

"I know."

"She's a monster."

"I know."

"I'll call you back later," Alex told him, and put her phone away.

Bobby whimpered and rolled over, pressing one hand against his face.

"Morning, Bobby."

"Eames," he croaked. "So…bright."

"Oh," she said. She quickly closed the curtains on the window. "Here. Better?"

Nodding, he uncovered his face. Alex pushed the call button. "They said to tell them when you're awake." She waited while the nurse assessed him and gave him some pills for his pain. When the woman left the room, Alex stepped closer.

He was staring at her.

"Not so blurry anymore?" she asked him.

"No," he said, and blinked.

"What did she want with you, Bobby? She's not talking."

He sighed heavily. Closing his eyes, he whispered the answer. "Sperm."

A wave of hatred coursed through Alex, and she recalled the things she said to Ross. "Why, Bobby?" Alex asked.

"She wants to conceive," he answered with a shrug. "She wanted me to donate."

"Did she-?"

He shook his head. "Not while… no. She wanted me to jerk off, leave a sample in the condom."

"The condom was never opened."

He nodded.

"Your pants were open," she told him.

Bobby closed his eyes, feeling sick to his stomach again. "I was trying to play along… buying time." He swallowed and looked up at Alex. "I didn't," he said. And then he wondered if, maybe after he was unconscious, maybe Nicole had…

"The condom was unopened. And I don't think she had time to try it, Bobby. Don't worry about it, okay?"

"Did the team, you know, swab me?"

"I'm sure they did. I'll find out for you, okay?"

Bobby nodded. He really, really hoped nothing had happened between him and Nicole. And as he had that thought, he remembered the kiss, and her hand on his crotch, and he squeezed his eyes shut. He rolled over, his back to Eames.

Alex ran a gentle hand along his back and whispered. "I'll step into the hall, Bobby. I won't leave you. I'll just find out about that swab."

He nodded, but said nothing. Alex stepped away, rubbing her sore elbow.

As Bobby tried to shove the ugly feelings aside, his memory conjured up the things she'd said. He remembered that comment about Eames, and he was angry. Nicole had struck a nerve with him, and though it didn't surprise him that she would say it, it surprised him that he was emotional about it.

He was embarrassed. Wallace knew how he felt about Eames. He tried to think past the pain in his head and his thoughts shifted to his partner. She'd been there in the night for him. She'd worked herself ragged trying to find his mother, trying to help him. And she'd hurt herself busting Nicole.

Bobby, in the safety of his head, realized that he wasn't just infatuated with his partner. He was in love with her.

And if somehow, Nicole had managed to get a sample of his sperm… he couldn't bear the thought that she might have his child. He thought of the bones of her only child, that were buried in the sand on the beach. He couldn't bring a child into the world to be raised by Nicole Wallace. With another whimper, he turned over in the bed. He couldn't think about that. He didn't know if she'd managed to take advantage of him. He had to set that worry aside and wait for the evidence. Bobby folded his arms in front of his chest. He tried to concentrate on sleep.

* * *

Eames was beside him again when he awoke. Her beautiful smile touched his heart. He smiled, too.

"You were clean, Bobby. She didn't…"

He breathed a long, slow sigh of relief. "Thanks, Alex," he said.

The sound of her name made her heart jump a little. He rarely called her Alex. Whenever he did, she felt like they were in that fuzzy zone in between colleagues and friends. Now that she thought about it, she thought she was in that zone a lot lately. And when he called her Alex, she wondered if he felt that way, too.

"You don't have to stay," he told her. "I'm okay, now."

Alex gave him a lopsided smile. "Well, before I go, I'd like to help you call your Mom."

Bobby had forgotten. Embarrassed, he nodded. He allowed Alex to help him raise up the back of the bed, and he got as comfortable as he could sitting upright.

She dialed the number for him and handed him the phone. "Uhm, this is Robert Goren. I wanted to speak to my Mom," he told the nurse.

"Oh, Mr. Goren, she'll be so pleased to hear from you. I hope you're feeling well," the nurse told him.

"Thank you," Bobby said quietly, and waited.

Within a few more minutes, he heard France's voice on the line. "Bobby?!" she said, excited.

"Hi, Ma," he said. "Are you okay?" they both asked simultaneously.

"I'm fine, Bobby. What about you?"

"I'm okay, Mom. Getting some rest."

"I will, too, now that I've heard your voice."

Bobby smiled. It wasn't often that he and his mother had these sweet moments. He cherished them. "Ma, I'm sorry about everything."

"The only thing you should be sorry for is telling me to leave you like that."

He nodded, closing his eyes. "I'm sorry about that," he said. His mother rambled on about how awful that had made her feel and how worried she'd been. "You did the right thing, Ma. You got the help I needed. Thank you, Ma."

"And you're all right?" she asked him again.

"Just a bad headache, Ma. I'm all right."

"You'll call me every day until you're home, you hear me?"

"Yes, Ma."

Alex watched him say goodbye, and took the phone from him to hang it up. She smiled at her partner. "I told you you'd feel better," Alex said.

Bobby nodded.

Alex leaned in and kissed him on the cheek. "Goodbye, Bobby. I'll see you tomorrow."

Bobby told her goodbye, and Alex went home.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

The first thing Bobby did when he got home from the hospital was shave. His beard was far too thick for summer comfort. He took his time, and took a shower, and cleaned the bathroom. Then, swiping his pillow from the bedroom, he stretched out on the couch to take a long nap.

He didn't hear the bell. Alex walked up and withdrew her copy of his key, something she rarely used. She saw him as soon as the door swung open, and let herself in quietly. Alex shut the door and locked it before tiptoeing to his side to look him over.

She was surprised to see him clean-shaven. One foot was flat against the cushion, his knee against the back rest. The other leg was bent, his foot just tucked in against the far arm of the couch. With his legs spread, it was hard not to notice the fullness through the gap in his boxers. His arms were folded over the t-shirt that covered his chest. Bobby's head was turned outward, and sunken into the soft pillow.

She felt a little awkward, coming into his home and seeing him like this. Alex thought about leaving, but she'd promised she would see him at dinnertime, and it was almost 7 o'clock. As she walked past him, she couldn't seem to keep her fingers from dipping into his gray curls. His hair was as soft as the last time she'd felt it.

Alex went into the kitchen. She'd stocked his fridge the day before, when they'd started talking about releasing him. Tonight, she pulled out the chicken and the vegetables and started to prepare dinner.

He heard the knife against the cutting board. As he awoke, his hand went to adjust his shorts. He sat up slowly, peeking over the couch to see who was in his apartment.

"Eames," he said, smiling.

"Feeling better?" she called back, with a smile of her own. "Dinner won't be for a half hour, if you want to nap some more."

He moved his hands over his face and then through his hair. Bobby shook his head. "I'm good," he said. He got to his feet, and only then realized he was in his underwear.

"Uhm, I, uh…"

"Don't worry about it, Bobby," Alex said, turning back to the vegetables. "It's your home. You just got out of the hospital. No judgment here." She grinned, and before she thought about it, she added, "Besides, those are some nice legs."

He looked down at his legs and rubbed the back of his neck with his hand. Bobby smiled. "If you say so." He went into the kitchen and sat on a chair, watching her work.

"You don't have to…" he told her.

Alex rolled her eyes at him. "We've already been through this, Bobby. It's just a dinner."

Bobby smiled. He realized he was headache free for the first time in a week. Then his smile grew. "I called Ma," he said. "Told her I was home."

"What did she say?"

"She still wants me to call every night."

"It's a mother's privilege."

"I don't mind," he admitted. After a pause, he added. "She told me Frank came by. Said he was glad I was getting better."

"Of course he is, Bobby."

"Didn't say where he'd been."

"You can't tell me that's a surprise."

Bobby shrugged. "I guess, you know… you always hope…"

"Nicole's lawyer has been calling. She wants to meet with you."

"Great. Somebody else happy I'm out of the hospital."

"I'll go in your stead, Bobby. If it's something about the case…"

He nodded. "Take Logan with you. I'd hate for your linebacker side to come out again."

"I wouldn't," Alex said honestly. She still found herself smiling when she thought about taking Wallace down.

"You know, Alex…" Bobby began. He almost lost his nerve. His leg started to bounce against the floor. "She said something to me… something about you…"

"What." It wasn't a question, it was a demand.

"No, it doesn't matter what. It's just that… it made me think."

Alex threw the rest of the vegetables in the saucepan and turned her full attention to her friend.

"When I think of you… lots of times, it's… it's not…" his face reddened and he had to swallow. He wished he were wearing pants. Bobby stood suddenly, and walked two paces towards her. "I don't think of you like the others, Alex."

"Huh?"

"You're not… one of the guys, a buddy."

"Sure I am."

He nodded. "You are, but you're not. When I think of you, Alex, I… I wish for something more."

"Well we have that. We're friends," she replied, starting to feel nervous herself. He'd been saying her name a lot, and she was feeling very fuzzy about their relationship.

"I know that," he conceded. His finger hovered in the air next to the outline of her bare arm, but he never touched. "I'd like us to be more," he said quickly. His finger traced the air along her arm again, and moved beside her neck, and her chin, and then gently, he touched her jaw. "I'd like…" his voice was barely a whisper. "I'd like to kiss you."

Alex could barely breathe. Instead of answering, she leaned ever so slowly, closer to him.

His lips were soft. He didn't force anything, just tasted her and pulled back a little. "You're so much more than a friend," he breathed, his words hot against her lips. "You were there for me, Alex. I'll never forget that."

Their lips met again, and this time, they explored a little deeper. Alex's hands went up his chest and around to the back of his neck, while his own hands moved easily down her spine. The kiss ended with only a few more nips. They pulled apart a little, and Alex touched her mouth with the back of her hand. "I… I've got to finish dinner," she said suddenly, feeling her pulse between her legs and the heat in her face.

"Oh, yeah, dinner," he mumbled. "It might burn."


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

She took Logan along for the ride, not because she didn't trust herself with Wallace, but because it was always good to know someone had your back.

As she drove, Alex's mind went over the events of the night before again. She still couldn't believe they'd kissed. She kissed him again when she'd said goodbye, and he'd given her the biggest, most genuine smile she'd ever seen.

"Wonder what the hell she wants?" Mike asked, breaking Alex away from far nicer thoughts.

"Knowing Nicole, more head games."

"How's Bobby?" Mike asked. He knew he'd gone home from the hospital yesterday.

"Good. He's catching up on his sleep, I think."

"Nothing like going home after a stay in the hospital." Mike had done that a few times, himself.

"He should be back at work Thursday." Alex pulled into the parking space and they got out of the car. They checked in at security and waited for the guards to inform them she was ready.

"Pretty quick recovery," Mike said, continuing their conversation from the car.

"The doc said as long as he's not feeling foggy and the headaches are manageable, he can come back."

"But you'll keep an eye on him," Mike said.

"You know it. One stumble, verbal or otherwise, and he's back on his couch."

"Detectives? She's situated," the guard said. He led them to a visitation room, where Nicole was already waiting. She wore an orange jumpsuit, and still had a scab on her chin.

"Oh. It's you," Nicole said, her voice filled with disappointment.

"Nice to see you, too, Nicole." Alex folded her arms and remained standing, while Mike took a seat opposite Nicole at the table. "Now. What do you want to talk about?"

"That's personal, between Bobby and me."

"You didn't get his sperm, Nicole. You don't have anything personal to talk to him about."

Nicole looked at Logan. "You'll help her to understand, won't you? Sometimes, a woman just needs to talk to a man."

"So talk to me, then," Mike said. Alex rolled her eyes from where she stood behind him.

"I'd love to, but I don't know you. I'm afraid Bobby is the only one who can hear me out."

"He's still recovering."

Nicole actually seemed pained to know this. "He's not still in hospital, is he?" Her face was full of worry.

"No, he's home now, but he's not up for," Mike's hands gestured around the room, "all this."

"Detective…" she said.

"Logan," Mike told her.

"Detective Logan. Please tell him I'm sorry. And when he is feeling better, I would really, really like to talk to him."

"That's it?" Alex asked. "Are we done here?"

Nicole looked earnestly at Mike, who gave her a nod. He got to his feet and followed Alex out the door.

"You're not telling him any of that," Alex said, fuming. "Did you see it? The whole world revolves around her."

"I don't know, she seemed remorseful."

"It's an act, Logan. That woman could kill you without blinking an eye and then turn on the waterworks as soon as it serves her purpose."

The got into the car. "I mean it," Alex added. "Don't tell him."

With a shrug and then a nod, Mike Logan agreed.

* * *

It looked like every book he owned was out in the living room. There were books on the floor, on the tables, on the couch, on the chair. With an upward glance, Alex saw there were even a few books in the kitchen.

"What's all this?" She asked him.

Bobby's energy was back. He was almost bouncing as he stood before her. "I'm, uh, cleaning up. Gonna get rid of a few of them," he said, scratching the back of his neck and looking around at the piles.

"Get rid of them?" she asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Well, you know… one or two of them."

Alex broke into a smile. For Bobby, getting rid of a book would be like having a tooth pulled. They were a part of him, even the ones he hadn't cracked open in years. If the book was important enough for him to have bought a copy, then it was not going to be easy to part with it.

"Can I help you with this… project?" she asked.

He nodded. "I just dusted the bookshelves. It's time to put them back."

She smiled again. That sounded more like him. "Any particular order?" she asked.

"Dewey."

Alex sighed. She'd used the library off and on her whole life, but never bothered to memorize all the rules about the Dewey decimal system. It figured that Bobby, whose mother had been a librarian, would like it. "Okay, so maybe I should just leave it to you and go pick up dinner somewhere."

"No, no," he said quickly, not wanting her to leave. "Just pick up that stack over there. We'll go top to bottom, so be careful the shelf doesn't tip until we get the bottom shelves weighed down."

"Okay." Alex turned and picked up the stack he'd mentioned. Bobby picked up another.

All in all, it took them almost an hour to put everything back. Bobby actually did have a small stack of books he was going to give away. They ordered a pizza and sat together on his couch while they waited for it to arrive.

His eyes had a spark again, and Alex reached out, touching his stubbly cheek with her palm. She smiled at him, happy to see him full of spunk.

Bobby grinned and swooped in to kiss her. He wasn't so tentative anymore. The fears of the first time were gone, and now he was playful and eager. Once when they broke apart, Alex chuckled.

Bobby pulled back. "What?" he asked, a broad smile still on his face.

"You're so happy tonight," she said. Alex's eyes held a spark now, too. His joy was contagious.

"What's not to be happy about?" he asked. "I had the day off, to do whatever I want, and now I have a beautiful girl beside me, who doesn't mind kissing me." He reached in and kissed her again, teasing her with his tongue.

Alex chuckled again, and before they could get more serious, the doorbell rang. Alex put a firm hand on his shoulder, to keep him from jumping up to answer. She was still worried about him, even though he seemed so much better.

"How was your day?" he asked her as they were eating.

"All right," she told him.

"What happened with Nicole?" he asked. He knew, without her saying, that she would have followed up on that.

"Nothing. She's playing games."

"What kind of games?"

"Nothing, just typical Nicole Wallace bullshit. A complete waste of time."

He could see she was getting irritated, so Bobby dropped it. He was excited about their new romance, and he didn't want to spoil the evening.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16

Upon his return to work, it appeared as if Bobby and Alex had never kissed. He kept on his professional persona, and so did she. The only difference was a few quiet moments when no one else was looking. Alex would ask him if he was holding up okay, or Bobby would let his eyes drift to admire her figure for a minute.

At closing time, Alex told Bobby to wait for her and headed back to her desk to pick up something she'd forgotten.

Logan was just coming back from the field. "Goren, welcome back," he said, and shook his colleague's hand.

"Thanks, man." Bobby grinned. "I appreciate everything you did for my mother," he said.

"Just doing my job," Mike said, shaking it off. "That Wallace, she's a doozie, eh?" Mike rolled his eyes.

"Well, life carves us out, you know?"

"Yeah, but to do all that to you and then to cry and want to talk to you after?"

"What?"

"I spoke with her. Last Monday. She's all remorseful. I think she wants to apologize to you."

Bobby nodded, but his lips turned into a frown. He muttered something to Mike about seeing him later, and after another five minutes' wait, Alex returned.

"Sorry," Alex said cheerfully. "When I got back to the desk, Roberts caught me with a million questions."

"Nicole wants to see me?" Bobby asked her.

Alex's expression fell. She took a long, deep breath. "Yeah."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"She just wants to torture you, to manipulate you somehow. You know that, Bobby."

"No," he said angrily, sticking up his index finger. "Unless I talk to her, I don't know what she wants." He marched away, back to the squad room, to put in a call to the prison.

Alex smacked her hand against the inside wall of the elevator, and the other two passengers jumped. Then she folded her arms and stared angrily at her blurred reflection in the polished steel.

* * *

He waited for them to bring her in. Bobby was on edge, both from the betrayal he felt about Alex and from his deep distrust of Nicole. But he wanted to know. He had to know why she wanted to talk to him.

He stared at her, stone-faced, while he waited for her to sit down across from him.

"I'm so glad you're well again," Nicole told him, with a touch of sincerity.

"You wanted to tell me something?" he said, cutting to the chase.

"I've seen the doctor here, twice."

Bobby waited for her to elaborate.

"The psychiatrist… for the state. Huang, I think his name is?"

"He's evaluating you. Determining your fitness for trial."

"With my lawyer's blessing, I'm afraid."

Bobby took a deep breath and sat back, his fingers splayed out on the table before him.

"I know it seems ridiculous. I've only spoken to him twice." She looked down and shook her head a moment. "I told you I was ready to move on to the next stage in my life."

Bobby looked around at the barren walls. "Looks like you have," he said quietly.

Nicole shook her head, and her eyes met his. "I thought I wanted children. The truth is, I am a child. I never grew past that selfish little girl…" She stared at him a moment. "You tried to tell me that, didn't you?"

Bobby shrugged. "I just did my job, Nicole."

"No. No. You cared, Bobby."

"Don't put feelings on me that aren't there. You'll only find yourself disappointed."

"That's not what I mean. I just mean that… there were moments, Bobby… in conversation with you, when you cared about me. One human being to another."

The room was silent for a few minutes. Bobby cocked his head. "So?" he asked her.

"All my life, I've been trying to fill this void…" she gestured to her heart. "I've tried to fill it with everything imaginable… money, sex, men, women… games." Nicole looked him in the eye again. "It's time I just face it. I'm empty. I'm an empty shell of a human being. It doesn't matter, now. It doesn't matter what happens to me here. I deserve whatever they give me."

"You tell Huang about these feelings?" he asked quietly.

"Oh, I'm not suicidal, Bobby. No worries there. I have come to a realization, though. All those things about me were true. I was a monster. I used people. That's the most dreadful sin of all, don't you think?"

Bobby was silent. He was doing his best to evaluate her mental state himself.

"I'll serve my time, Bobby. Whether it be 40 years or life plus 40. I deserve it." She cried, and damned if they didn't seem like genuine tears. "I only wish that…"

"What?" he whispered.

"I could never ask you that."

"Well, that's the reason you asked me here, isn't it?"

"I wish that you would visit me while I'm here."

Bobby stiffened a little. He looked around the room, tracing his eyes along a staggered path in the mortar between the cinder blocks. "You're asking my forgiveness?" he inquired.

"No. What I've done is unforgivable."

He nodded. "I don't know, Nicole. I don't know if I can make a promise like that."

She took a deep breath and held back her tears. She nodded at him. Bobby got up and walked as far as the door. "Bobby," Nicole Wallace said in a wavering voice. "Thank you for coming."

He turned back, gave her a quiet nod, and walked out.

* * *

Eames ran that night. She ran whenever she was upset. It was the only thing that helped her clear away the bad feelings. Tonight it wasn't working. She ran almost seven miles and finally had to convince herself that starting a relationship with Bobby was a foolish idea in the first place. It couldn't have been real love, anyway. Just some kind of a bond they were feeling because of what had just happened with Nicole. She would buck up, focus on the job, and pretty soon things would go back to normal.

Resolved, she walked home and let herself in. But one more thought kept nagging at her. Why had she ever thought she understood Bobby Goren?


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17

He got her coffee, as usual. Alex paused before sitting in her desk chair. She reached out and wrapped the fingers of her right hand around the cup. "Thanks," she said.

"Good morning," Bobby told her. He already had his Detective face on.

"I suppose it went well?" Alex asked softly.

He shrugged and twisted uncomfortably in his chair. "I don't even know where to begin. I'd rather forget about it, honestly." He handed over a report he'd been reading. "Forensics from the car swap case."

"Oh," Alex said, taking the paper from his hand. She sipped her coffee, sat down, and read it carefully.

* * *

But Bobby couldn't forget about it. He'd already called Huang the night before and they'd put her under suicide watch. Nicole swore to everyone that she wasn't planning to hurt herself, but there were enough red flags to warrant the extra observation.

Bobby couldn't get her out of his mind. Eames thought she was playing head games, trying to entertain herself while she was in prison. But Bobby couldn't say for sure. She had seemed different this time. She had seemed genuine.

And he wondered once again if he was so different from Nicole. If he had suffered sexual abuse rather than emotional and physical… if he'd been born female instead of male…

It was something he'd given a lot of thought to the last time he'd crossed paths with Nicole Wallace. And Bobby didn't have the answer. It was something very basic that the two of them shared: this unanswered need, that they each had learned to fill in their own ways.

And just like that, the memory of her lips on his, her hand in his lap…

Bobby shivered.

"You okay?" Alex asked.

She'd been asking him that for three days now. "Fine," he snapped.

"I could have sworn you shivered."

He looked over at her profile. She was behind the wheel, throwing him an occasional glance as she slipped in and out of traffic. "Look, you don't have to baby me."

"It's 90 degrees outside, Goren. Not exactly shivering weather."

"I said I'm fine."

"All right, okay! Excuse me for caring."

He rubbed his hand through his shaggy hair and looked away from her. It had been like this all day. Almost anything either one of them said turned into bickering.

"Just drop me at the tunnel," he said.

"You're not coming back to the squad."

"No. You can handle it."

She threw him an angry look.

"Maybe I need the rest, okay?"

"I thought you said you were fine."

"Well, maybe I'm not."

Now her glances were concerned.

Bobby did feel terrible, but not one bit of it was physical. "Just drop me off, okay?"

Without another word, she pulled over. He climbed out quickly, shut the door, and walked away without a backward glance.

Before she pulled back into the lane, Alex let out a hefty sigh. Maybe she'd been wrong about everything. Maybe they wouldn't get back to normal after all.

She shook her head. It was all because of Nicole Wallace. Whatever she had said to him had knocked him for a loop. Alex's lips tightened. Even as she hoped that Bobby would see things for what they were, Frank Goren popped into her mind. Maybe Bobby was more like his brother than he knew. Maybe Alex should just let him go.

* * *

Bobby rode the train back to the neighborhood and parked himself at a bar for the bulk of the evening. He staggered home and crawled into bed.

* * *

They missed each other in the office the next day. Nothing was moving on their case, and all they had to do was follow up on other people's work. The weekend passed in an icy silence.

Monday morning was a fresh start, and Bobby, once again, bought her a coffee. This time neither of them mentioned Nicole. Alex didn't inquire about his health, either. They were very careful with each other.

They were careful all week long. And they managed to solve a case. By Friday, Alex was ready to extend an olive branch. "Look, I don't even know how things got like this," she said. "I'm sorry, Bobby."

"No, you don't need to apologize," he told her. "I've been moody, and I guess—"

She didn't want to hear him blame himself. She wanted to melt the ice between them. "Buy you a drink?" she interrupted.

He was shocked by the offer. He just hadn't figured on Alex opening the door again so soon. "I, uh, I can't," he said, looking down at his shoes. "I have an appointment to keep."

* * *

Nicole, even without makeup, was a beautiful woman. She smiled at him, but made no move toward him. "When they said I had a visitor I didn't believe it," she told him.

"How are you?" He said it without enthusiasm. He still wasn't sure about her.

"I'm good, Bobby. Very well, actually. They've taken me off suicide watch. Thank you for that."

He didn't respond. He didn't want to admit he had been concerned.

"And you? Your bump to the head has healed?"

"Yeah. Fine." They sat quietly for a moment, neither sure of what to say. Bobby finally broke the ice. "Still seeing Huang?" he asked.

Nicole nodded. "Once a week."

"That's not typical."

"My lawyer told me." Huang usually conducted evaluations and then made recommendations for therapy. It was highly unusual for him to take on an inmate as a patient. "I initially thought it was because he wanted me."

Bobby looked away, trying not to roll his eyes.

"But I mentioned that to Dr. Huang, and I realized how egocentric it was. So I asked him why he was bending the rules for me."

Bobby made eye contact with her again.

"He said he thought he could help me."

Goren nodded. He'd never been to Huang as a patient, but he'd always heard good things about him. He was glad Nicole had found a doctor who wanted to really help her.

"I had another breakthrough," she said timidly. He cocked his head at her. "Huang noticed that I'm a little… infatuated… with you, Bobby."

He rubbed the back of his neck, feeling very uncomfortable.

"It's been that way for years. Ever since you found out my real name."

His knee began to bounce under the table.

"Oh, don't be nervous, Bobby. I know nothing can ever come of it. But Huang spoke with me, and I realized something."

"What?"

"You're fascinating to me, Bobby. You're fascinating because… we're kindred spirits, I think."

Now he was very uncomfortable. Her breakthrough echoed his own.

"And I can't even fathom why you give me the time of day, after all I've done." She looked down at her hands for a moment, then raised her eyes again. "But I am grateful that you came."


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18

Three weeks went by, and Bobby saw her faithfully, every Friday night. Eames continued to ask him to join her for a drink, but she seemed to expect him to reject her.

Bobby was torn. He was fascinated by Nicole, he always had been. And the more he spoke with her, the more he wondered if she was sincere. But he still felt a bond with Alex, and though their romance had come to a screeching halt, somewhere in the dark recesses of his mind he still wondered if there could be a chance for them.

He just couldn't decide what to do about it, and so he worked closely with her by day, and saw Nicole on Friday nights and his mother on Sunday afternoons.

Today was the Fourth of July. He'd planned to stay home, cook himself a nice dinner and maybe unclog the kitchen sink. Bobby had been putting it off, and since he had no date for the evening, it seemed as good a time as any.

He dipped a wire snake into the drain and worked it through the pipe as well as he could. He was halfway through when his phone rang. Bobby wiped his filthy hands on a towel and answered. "Goren," he said.

"We got a scene," Alex said. "Somebody decided to shoot under cover of the finale of the fireworks show in Central Park." She continued to tell him exactly where.

"I'll be right there," he told her. Bobby left the drain as it was and grabbed his badge. He donned his holster as well, and headed out. Alex was already working the scene. She was in a sleeveless tank, the kind that made it impossible not to look at her bust. He respectfully averted his eyes, only to notice the toned muscles of her arm. Alex walked past him, and he had to pivot and follow. She laid out the facts she'd already collected, and Bobby had a quick examination of the body. He concurred with her assessment of things.

Then began a long night of interviews. At three in the morning, they'd pinpointed their POI and all they had to do was wait for the evidence to come back from CSU.

"You, uh… you were out tonight?" he asked her.

Alex was unnerved for a moment, before remembering she was with Bobby and nothing ever escaped his attention. "Yeah," she said. "I was on the other end of the crowd. I didn't hear a thing."

"You went out alone?" he asked, not that it was any of his business.

"Yeah. Why?"

Bobby fidgeted and stammered. "N-nothing, I don't know, never mind."

"Goren," she said. "I thought we were past all this."

The stars were bright overhead, a rare sight in a rainy summer season. Bobby shifted on his feet. "You look nice," he said. "Beautiful."

Her jaw dropped. Hadn't they just spent the last month pretending nothing had ever happened?

"But I don't know, you're right. I mean…" He swallowed hard. "Alex," he called quietly.

"Bobby?" she replied.

"I wasn't trying to end things between us. I guess I don't know what I thought."

Her heart started pounding. "Are you saying…?"

"I guess I need to know what you want."

"What I want…" her head was spinning, and she thought she might need to sit down. "Bobby, I don't know…"

"You seemed to know a month ago. But I got upset with you and you took that as the end of everything."

"Wasn't it?"

He tucked his hands in his pockets, looked down at his feet, and shook his head. "We never even gave it a chance," he said.

"And you want to now."

"Do you?"

Alex felt her eyes growing moist, and she turned to walk away from him. She didn't want him to see how emotional he made her. "I don't know, Bobby," she said again. She felt her strength returning, and she spun to face him once more. "It's too hard. I don't think I can love anybody anymore."

"You can," he whispered. Bobby took a step closer. "You do." He made eye contact for all of a second, and then looked down at his feet once more.

"What about you?" She asked. It wasn't fair, him putting her on the spot. "Do you… love…?"

His eyes seemed to bore into hers, and he gave the slightest hint of a nod.

"Well, what if—"

"We figure it out," he said.

"But you're so—"

"I know I am."

With every exchange, Bobby moved closer to her. His hand found hers. "I want to try, Alex. Can't we just… try?" He felt her hand squeezing his, and he was reminded of how she stayed by him in the hospital.

Alex nodded, and Bobby almost kissed her. They were out in public, with a crime scene 50 yards away, and they were wearing their badges. Instead, he hurried along with her at his side until they got to the mustang. Bobby opened the door for her, and circled around to get in on the driver's side. "Is your car here?" he asked her.

"No," she answered. She'd come to the park straight from 1PP.

Without thinking it through, he drove her to his place. In the rickety elevator, he finally tasted her lips. Their hands started to wander, and Bobby was anxious to bring her home.

Upon opening the door, they were assaulted with the sour smell of the clogged kitchen drain. Alex raised a hand to cover her mouth and nose. "What is that?!" she cried.

"Aw, damn it! I forgot!" He took three steps to the kitchen, and then two steps back to Alex. "The drain's clogged. Before the call-out, I was snaking it. Just… I can fix it if you just give me a few minutes."

"Please. Do." She kept her hand over her mouth and watched him working.

He freed up the drain, and then ran dishsoap in the water in an attempt to freshen up the room. At last he gave up and opened the window. "Maybe in a few minutes it will smell better," he said, blushing.

Alex was laughing. She clapped her hands against her knees and simply laughed. Bobby grinned too, and by four in the morning he had everything cleaned up again.

He stood with his hands in his pockets. "Where were we?" he asked her.

Alex yawned. "We were tired," she said with a touch of her usual snark.

"Aw, this is the worst…"

"Shhh." Alex stopped him. She moved forward and stood right in front of him. Alex folded her arms and gave him a smile. "Would it be okay to just crash together?"

"C-crash?"

"Sleep?"

"S-sleep… together?"

She nodded. "Just sleep," she warned.

He was nodding eagerly. Bobby reached for her and kissed her sweetly on the lips. Then he led her to his room. She kept her tank top on, but removed her jeans and her bra.

Bobby pulled off his blue jeans, and yanked his t-shirt over his head. In just his boxers, he turned the covers back for her. "Uh, do you have a preference?" He asked, gesturing to the two sides of the bed.

"I prefer a mattress and a pillow," she told him, yawning again. Alex climbed in on the side she was close to, and soon he was beside her.

They had one long, luscious kiss, and then they went to sleep.


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19

His arm was draped over her waist. When Alex woke, she enjoyed a long, deep breath. It had been years since she'd woken up in someone's arms. It felt good. With a stretch and a yawn, she rolled into him, turning onto her back.

He adjusted the position of his hand as he sighed. Bobby was still in dreamland. His breath tickled her ear and she had to tilt her head away a little.

Alex managed to sit up far enough to read the time on his alarm clock. She realized they would have to go in to the squad soon. She turned towards him once more, and pressed a gentle kiss to his lips. "Bobby," she whispered. "Bobby, wake up."

He blinked his eyes open, and gave her a sleepy smile.

"It's almost nine," she said. "We have to get to work."

He took in a long breath and sighed. "Later," he complained, allowing his hand to caress the soft skin of her belly.

Alex groaned with longing. "Look, I want it too, but we don't have time. C'mon, Bobby. The case?"

He sighed again and rolled onto his back. "Okay. You win."

"I'll make it up to you," she said, getting to her feet. "I'll buy you breakfast."

He gave her a look that said that could never make up for what they were missing. Alex grabbed her jeans off the floor and slipped them on. Then she took her bra in hand and walked to the bathroom.

With a heavy sigh, Bobby rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. He rolled out of bed and got dressed.

* * *

It was a bear of a case. They worked straight through and Bobby managed to get a confession in interrogation just before he got a personal call.

Alex coordinated the prisoner's transfer to Rikers and then went to check in with him.

"It's my mother," he explained. "I… I've got to go up there."

Alex nodded. "Go. I'll take care of things here."

He nodded in gratitude and she touched his arm as he walked by.

* * *

Bobby had to stay in the room with her or she would start raving again. He managed to quiet her, and they eventually got her to take her pills willingly, which spared her the restraints and the injection. The nurses said she hadn't slept in two days. By the time she finally fell asleep, Bobby was beyond tired. He scrubbed his face with his hands and went for a walk down the hall.

It was all because of Frank. Frank had come by and started her off on a train of thought that led to her cheeking her meds and spitting them out. Bobby had no proof, of course, but the nurses told him Frank had visited a week ago, enough time for the level of meds in her system to do no good whatsoever.

Bobby tried to rub some life back into his arms. He walked the length of the hall two times, and then he realized it was Friday.

Well, she had to understand he had obligations. Nicole was coming along in therapy, but she had to know there would be times when he couldn't make it.

He scratched his head. He'd just gotten his summer haircut yesterday, and every time he touched it, he forgot how short it was. Eames complimented him on it. She always said he looked nice when he had his hair trimmed.

Bobby paused in the hall to turn back in the direction of his mother's room. Things hadn't worked out as he had planned for them this week. Every time they tried to pursue the romance, they were interrupted by something.

With a sigh, he pulled out his phone.

"Eames," she said.

"Hi."

"Bobby, how is she?"

"Sleeping, finally. I got her to take her meds."

"That's good."

"The case?"

"Closed it out. Take your time with your Mom, Bobby."

"I'm sorry about how things worked out."

"Huh?"

"I wanted to… have some time with you."

"We have time," Alex said. "Family's important. In fact, that's what I'm gonna spend my weekend doing. I'm gonna watch Nate tomorrow night so Liz and Terry can go out on a date."

"Sounds like fun. Wish I could help."

"Maybe next time." After a pause she said, "I guess you missed your Friday thing."

"Huh? Oh, yeah. Yeah."

"Is that a big deal?"

"No. She can just, you know, she can wait."

"Who is 'she?'" Alex asked, speaking the word as if it were a name.

Bobby cleared his throat. "Uh, well, uh… Nicole." There was dead silence on the other end of the line, and Bobby rushed to fill it. "I, uh, I've been visiting her."

"You have."

"Yeah, Huang took her as a patient, and she's been having these breakthroughs."

"I can't believe I'm hearing this."

"Why? There's nothing to it, Alex, just a conversation once a week. I'm like a sounding board for her."

"At least Huang gets paid for it."

"Okay, look, you don't have to understand. It's just something I feel like I should do."

"Why? After all that woman has done, why do you feel you should give her anything?"

Bobby bristled. He didn't like to talk about Nicole. He knew that Alex wouldn't, couldn't understand. And as uncomfortable as he was trying to figure it out himself, he didn't feel like trying to explain himself to Eames. "You're jealous?" he probed.

"God, no, Bobby. I just… Forget it." They were silent a moment. "Look, I gotta go. My dinner just arrived."

"Yeah. Look, I'm sorry about… about everything."

"Me too. Take care of your Mom. I'll be here when you get back."

* * *

He never quite got rid of the ugly feeling after the call. Maybe Alex had been right. Maybe it was stupid to try and love someone at this stage of the game. Maybe he was too accustomed to his independence, too set in his ways. He went back to his mother's room and settled in on the rollaway bed they'd brought in for him. Bobby tossed and turned for quite a while, but he finally fell asleep.


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter 20

The interruption of caring for his mother and the revelation that Bobby was visiting Nicole every Friday put the brakes on things between Bobby and Alex once again.

Bobby was having second thoughts. And Alex wouldn't admit it, but she was angry. So they went back to work and threw themselves into the job and tried to be civil to each other.

This Friday, Nicole was very emotional. She listened to his explanation and tried to keep from crying. When it was her turn to speak, she told him about her session with Huang, and about her feelings when Bobby stood her up.

"For a moment, I… I hated you." Nicole admitted. "I daydreamed about… about horrible things." She seemed very upset with herself. Nicole covered her mouth with one hand and shook as a few tears fell from her eyes. "I don't want to be that person anymore, Bobby," she told him. "But I was so hurt… Dr. Huang says I have a lifetime of dangerous patterns to overcome."

Bobby hated to see her tears. He offered her his handkerchief to wipe her eyes. Then he reached out his right hand and held her left until she regained her composure.

Then, in the moment, it seemed like the right thing to do. She was upset, and he comforted her. But on the way home, Bobby felt goose bumps wash over him. He entertained the idea that she was manipulating him, but he thought about her work with Huang, and again, her words seemed sincere. Maybe Nicole was finally getting the help she'd needed all her life. Maybe she was changing.

* * *

"You're still at work?" Alex asked him. "I thought you would, you know, go see her…"

"I did. And now I'm back." He didn't want to talk about Nicole. Not to Alex. "What did you want, anyway?" he asked.

"I thought maybe, if you're up for it, we could have that drink we've been putting off."

Bobby twirled his mechanical pencil in the fingers of his left hand. He watched it spin around a couple more times, and then said, "Okay. Okay, I'll come."

Alex was shocked. She told him which bar to meet her at, and he realized right away it wasn't a cop bar, and it was very far from 1PP.

* * *

The dancing was the thing that broke him. He was planning to go, make light conversation, and have a good stiff one. He wasn't planning to get close to her again. Three strikes and you're out, right? They already had two. Bobby wasn't in any hurry to get the third.

But the band had started to play, and it was hard to talk over their volume. And then she'd pulled him out to the dance floor.

Alex Eames! Dancing. The product of one too many drinks.

Alex never danced. Not in public, anyway. She was very self-conscious about it. She even told him once that she'd taken lessons just to be able to dance with her husband at their reception.

But Bobby loved to dance. It was second nature to him. When she pulled him to the floor, his feet were already moving to the music. His hands fell into place, and before long their bodies did their talking for them.

By the end of the song, she was fully in his embrace, and her ear was tucked against his chest. He leaned down to kiss her, and as soon as his lips connected with hers, she pulled away and stiffened.

"What?" he asked, exasperated.

She stared at him, shook her head firmly, and walked out the back door of the bar. The air outside was heavy with humidity, but the air was slightly cooler than inside. Alex took a deep breath and tried to get a grip on her emotions.

The alcohol had done a number on her, though. Usually she had no problem rationalizing things and overcoming her unwelcome feelings. But tonight, she was overwhelmed and smitten and terrified.

"Alex?" He asked, and there was concern in his voice.

"Just what does it take, Bobby?" she asked, folding her arms and refusing to turn around to face him. "I've given all I can, but you just don't seem to see it."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"You… me. I love you, Bobby. That's what I'm talking about."

The idea of having this conversation scared the hell out of him. He smiled and tried to joke it off. "You're just… that's the drink talking."

"No. You see what I mean? You don't see it."

"Look, I told you I'd like for us to be more…"

"But words don't mean much, Bobby. Actions do. And when it comes down to it, you'd rather make time for that crazy bitch than for me." Tears welled up in Eames' eyes, and she finally turned to face him. "And this isn't jealousy, so don't even start. All this time, I've done my best to be a good friend, and I don't know what more I can do. How can I show you I love you, Bobby? I show you all the time."

"You don't have to do… any of it. You don't have to do anything. I love you. I do."

Alex shook her head. "No. If you loved me, there would be something... somehow, you'd reciprocate."

"Alex," he groaned.

"What is it that makes her so appealing to you, Bobby? What are you getting out of it?"

"C'mon, Eames! This isn't some kind of… choice… between her or you."

Alex shrugged, and the tears finally dried up. She felt a chill go through her body, but the words slipped out anyway. "Maybe it is."

She watched the emotions work across his face. She sighed and turned to walk away, out to the street at the end of the alley.

"Eames, wait. You're drunk."

"I'll catch a cab, Bobby."

"Let me walk you. Just to be sure you're safe."

"I can handle myself."

He dropped back, but he kept her in sight until she climbed into a cab and it pulled away.


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter 21

He called her several times over the weekend, but she refused to answer. She didn't even listen to the messages after a while. Alex spent Saturday nursing a hangover and then, just for the hell of it drove to Atlantic City. She blew a hundred dollars on slots and spent the rest of the weekend in the hotel spa.

She tried not to think about him.

* * *

'Goddammit Alex, will you just call me back?!" he snarled into the phone. "I want to explain. I want to try to explain. But you're not giving me a chance."

He hadn't slept more than a half hour at a time the whole weekend. He couldn't stop thinking about the things she'd said. He'd given Nicole a lot of thought, and finally figured out why he kept going back. And he needed to tell Alex about it. Because he had to keep going back, and he needed Alex to understand.

By Sunday, he knew it was hopeless. She wasn't going to give him a chance. He wasn't sure how in hell they were going to work together on Monday, but he knew Eames. He knew she'd be there, like clockwork.

Bobby drove to Carmel Ridge to see his mother. After the grin and the obligatory kiss, he became consumed by his thoughts.

"What's eating you?" she asked him.

He shook the thoughts away. "Nothing."

"Bobby, I know you. Spit it out."

"It's nothing, Ma. Just… you know… women problems."

"Women? Well, I hope you don't screw it up. It's about time you thought about settling down."

"What? Settling down? I never said anything about settling down."

"Still. You're in love. No man was ever tortured so who wasn't in love."

Bobby sighed and shook his head, letting his eyes roll back and close.

"Tell me about her."

"Aw, Ma…"

"Go ahead. Tell me."

"It's not her that's the problem," he muttered.

"Come on," his mother prodded. She walked past him and sat on the low couch in her room. She patted the cushion and Bobby sat beside her. "You're tired. You're consumed by this."

"She thinks I don't love her."

"Have you told her."

"I told her. She doesn't believe me."

"Well, that's simple. You show her, then. You woo her."

He chuckled at that. "Woo her?" He shook his head. "You don't know her," he said.

"She's a woman?" When he nodded, she said again, "Woo her. Spend time with her. Take her somewhere special."

Bobby's thoughts raced. He spent all of his time with her, at work. How was he supposed to make spending more time with her special? She wouldn't even let him kiss her Friday night.

"You're not telling me everything."

"Ma…"

"There's more to the story."

"It's complicated."

"That's what everyone says these days. Love isn't complicated. It's selfishness that complicates things."

"You're saying I'm being selfish."

"Are you? You didn't say."

"Ma, it's not selfish to visit someone who's lonely."

"Aha… another woman, is it?"

Bobby clamped his mouth shut. He could see this wasn't going to go well for him.

"Lonely, how? Convalescing? Her husband just left her? What?"

"She's in prison."

"Good God, Bobby, you work so hard to put them there and then you feel guilty about it. I told you years ago this wasn't the job for you. At least with that Wallace woman, you couldn't possibly have any regrets. Pure evil, she is."

Bobby's eyes met his mother's. He didn't say a word.

"Oh, Bobby! You're not!"

"She's been in therapy. She's changed."

"No, you can't change that kind of evil. The Devil has that woman in his grip."

Bobby was aggravated. "You don't know—"

"She kidnapped me and held me captive. I had plenty of time to sort her out, young man. You be smart. You stay away from her. No good can come from this. I don't care what she's told you. She hasn't changed. She's setting you up, gonna use you again."

Bobby got up from the couch, walked two steps away, and rubbed the back of his neck with his hand.

His mother quoted Shakespeare.

"My love is as a fever, longing still

For that which longer nurseth the disease,

Feeding on that which doth preserve the ill,

Th' uncertain sickly appetite to please.

My reason, the physician to my love,

Angry that his prescriptions are not kept,

Hath left me, and I desperate now approve

Desire is death, which physic did except.

Past cure I am, now reason is past care,

And frantic-mad with evermore unrest;

My thoughts and my discourse as madmen's are,

At random from the truth vainly expressed:

For I have sworn thee fair, and thought thee bright,

Who art as black as hell, as dark as night."

"Oh, c'mon, Ma!"

"Maybe there's good reason you're not sleeping. Maybe you've been thinking it, too."

"I'm going for a soda. You want a soda?"

She shook her head, and he left the room. Frances knew he would be back. He just had a lot to think about.

* * *

When he saw Eames on Monday morning, his first emotion was relief. Within seconds of feeling that, it was replaced by anger.

"Morning," she said as she sat down.

"You never called me."

"No. I didn't." She stared at him. She had her own share of anger.

"I was trying to answer your question."

"You know what, Bobby? Not here. Not now."

He closed his mouth and gave her a curt nod. "Fine."

As he turned his attention to the paperwork on his desk, she stole a few glances at him. He had taken some time on his appearance, but the bags under his eyes betrayed how tired he was. She knew Bobby hadn't been sleeping.

She felt a pang of guilt about that, but then she shoved it away. He was making his own choices, and she was doing what she had to do to stay true to herself.


	22. Chapter 22

Chapter 22

"Goren," he said, wiping away the sleep from his eyes. He'd finally fallen hard asleep, and it took a moment to shake off the fog.

"Detective Goren, she asked that we inform you."

"What? She? Who? What's happened?"

"This is Sid Narsten, out at Rikers. Nicole Wallace has been hospitalized."

"What? What happened?"

"It's a… the team is still trying to figure it out. She's in a lot of pain, and she asked we give you a call."

"What… what am I supposed to do? Can I see her?"

"Since you're NYPD, I'm sure we could make that possible."

"Does she want to see me?"

"Well, she did ask that we call you. I'd say probably."

"All… all right, I'll come out as soon as I can."

"I'll let her know, Detective."

* * *

She was on her side when he arrived, and she didn't look well. The nursing staff didn't give him any information, just pointed him in the right direction. Bobby walked over to her side and stood by her.

"Hello, Bobby," she croaked, obviously both in pain and under the influence of something.

"Nicole," he said quietly.

"I guess I'm becoming a bit of a nuisance."

He couldn't answer that honestly, so he only gave her a small smile. "What do they think is wrong?"

"They're going to do an ultrasound tomorrow… maybe gall bladder…"

"They do that here?" he asked.

"I don't know," she lied. Bobby could tell she was lying right away. Nicole, in spite of her situation, smiled just a little when she said it.

He nodded. "Well, uh… I hope they figure it out." He started to turn away, but her hand closed over his and he felt a chill spread from the source of the contact over and up his spine.

"Bobby… thank you for coming…"

He nodded and grunted something, then left. He couldn't shake the chilling feeling, and that conversation with his mother kept reverberating in his head.

When Bobby got home, he called Eames.

"Yeah?" she said into the phone.

At least she was answering now. "I, uh…" he didn't know what he should say. "I just came from Rikers," he admitted.

Alex's jaw set. She could see no reason for him to be telling her anything about this.

"Nicole's uh… she might have gall bladder problems. They're going to transport her to Elmhurst to have tests."

"And?" Alex was impatient.

"She lied. She lied about where they were going to do the tests."

"And this surprises you?"

Now he was angry. His face reddened, and for a moment he felt like his tongue was swollen. "I just thought we should, you know, be ready for anything. I'm gonna ask the Captain to get some security on my mother."

At the mention of his mother, Alex's heart softened a little. Bobby was right. If Nicole lied about tomorrow, she was surely planning something. And since her last plans had put both Bobby and his mother in danger, there was good reason to keep an eye on the current situation. "Okay, yeah. That's a good idea. You want to follow along?" Alex asked him.

"No." He said it so quickly she was surprised. "But I do want to, you know, monitor things from a distance. I got a copy of the transport plan from Riker's. Got the names and numbers of everyone from here to Elmhurst that's supposed to be guarding her tomorrow.

"Is she faking it?"

He sighed. "I don't know. She looked… uncomfortable. But I wouldn't put it past Nicole to have ingested something in order to pull off the abdominal pain."

"We could ask Riker's. See if there might have been something."

"I already did. If she got hold of something, it came from another prisoner. There's nothing suspicious in her mail and the only visitor she's had is me. Huang wouldn't have slipped her anything."

"What time is she leaving the island?"

"Paperwork says 9 a.m."

* * *

Bobby didn't sleep again. His mind was running over all of the possibilities. Nicole most certainly had a plan to escape. He wondered if she didn't also have a plan for revenge.

He'd already checked on Howard. The guy hadn't made bail. If Nicole escaped, he would most likely be safer in jail, anyway.

So that left Bobby and his mother. Bobby didn't really know all that had transpired between his Mom and Nicole. Nicole's only comment had been complimentary, but he knew deep down the two had chafed.

His mother had given him some insight, but he didn't know the details. And with Nicole's sick infatuation with him, he could easily imagine her treating his mother as some kind of rival. He wracked his brain, trying to remember if Nicole had ever learned that the reason he'd stood her up that one time was because of his Mom.

Ross had agreed to contact the Sheriff's office, and have them send someone over to Carmel Ridge until Nicole was safely tucked back into her cell at Riker's. At least that was something.

Goren flipped over and looked at his clock. It was 4 a.m. He knew there wasn't a chance in hell that he was going to get any more sleep. With an angry smack to the mattress, he pushed himself to his feet and went to take a shower.

* * *

They'd just gotten back from their monthly departmental meeting when Bobby's phone rang. He grunted a couple of times, thanked the caller, and hung up. He looked across the desk at Eames. "She's en route," he announced.

Alex frowned and nodded, and they both tried to concentrate on paperwork.

The time seemed to pass at a snail's pace. Neither of them could concentrate well, particularly Bobby. At 9:45, he started checking his phone obsessively. At 10:00, Alex left her desk to go find out if there had been any traffic accidents on Nicole's route to the hospital.

When she returned, he looked up at her expectantly. She shook her head, and he raked his fingers through his hair. He checked the time again. "If she's escaped now, she could be in Carmel Ridge by, uh… 11:30."

"The Sheriff's up there," Alex reminded him, her quiet voice trying to set him at ease.

He nodded stiffly. "She can't come after me here…" he muttered.

"She might lay low a while, then make her move. We'll have to wait… get confirmation that she's escaped."

His phone rang and he nearly dropped it as he picked it up. "Goren," he grunted. A wave of relief washed over him. "Thank you." He hung up and looked at Alex. "They took her to Bellevue instead. Some kind of equipment problem at Elmhurst. She's still in custody."

Alex gave him an encouraging smile. There was still a chance Nicole would try something, but at least they knew she hadn't escaped yet.


	23. Chapter 23

Chapter 23

At 2:45, Bobby's phone rang. He snatched it up quickly, and Alex saw the look of worry on his face. "Okay, I'll uh… I'll be right there." He hung up and looked over at his partner. "There was a fire at Carmel Ridge. They had to evacuate, and—"

"Just go, Bobby. Call me after things are settled." With a nod, he was off and running. Alex sat back and touched the tip of her pen to her lips. Wallace hadn't escaped, so far as they knew. She was still in Bellevue Hospital. Maybe it was just a fluke.

Alex did another hour's paperwork and then headed out to survey the neighborhood where this latest victim had grown up. She and Bobby weren't finding any kind of motive behind her killing. Maybe if she knew more about the woman's past, she would get some ideas, some leads.

* * *

Bobby connected with the Sheriff's deputy right away. "She's fine. She's over there at the picnic tables with the rest of them."

With some relief, Bobby smiled and glanced at the group of residents. Then he turned back to the deputy. "What happened?"

"Custodian grabbed something off his shelf, it fell and rolled too close to the pilot on the water heater. Had a little explosion in there."

"Thank you, for everything," he said and then hurried off in the direction of his mother.

"Bobby!" Frances shouted joyfully. "Have you all met my son? He's a detective," she told the other patients proudly. Frances stood and Bobby had to stoop low to give her a hug.

"Hello, Ma," he said. "You all right?" he asked.

"Besides a sunburn, you mean? When are they going to let us back in? I can see the building from here. There's no fire."

"Well, there was a fire, Ma. I'm sure they'll let you back in as soon as they can."

She made a noise of disapproval. "They should let us in now, clean up the mess later. Don't they know the hot sun isn't good for old people?"

He smiled and gave his mother a nod. "I know, Ma. But there's nothing I can do. The fire department has to—"

"Lot of good it does, you having that big fancy badge," she grumbled, and sat back down.

Bobby smiled and tried to make small talk with her friends. He sat with them another twenty minutes, and then he helped the staff bring people back inside to their rooms.

"I don't see why you had to come all the way up here," Frances complained as he escorted her back to her room. She eased herself down into her easy chair.

"I'm on the list," he said. "They call me when there's some kind of emergency."

"Emergency," she scoffed. "It wasn't even anywhere near me. I'm on the third floor!"

"Better safe than sorry, Ma."

"And what's with that officer hanging around all day?"

"What?"

"You saw him, Bobby. He's been walking my hall all day."

"He's uh… it's nothing."

"Is he here because of you?"

Bobby squeezed his eyes shut and shook his head. "Forget about it, Ma. It's nothing to worry about. He's a good guy."

"It's that woman."

"Ma. You've had a long day. Why don't you just… are you hungry? I'll take you out for dinner. I mean, I'm here already. I'll sign you out. We'll go to that little place that has the cannoli like you like 'em."

"She's free? She's escaped?"

"No, she didn't escape, Ma. She's in custody."

Frances cocked her head at her son. He squirmed.

"She was taken out for a medical procedure. I just didn't want to take a chance that she might try something."

Frances gave him an approving smile. "Dinner sounds nice," she said, and took hold of Bobby's hand.

* * *

She got what she needed from her side trip through the neighborhood. Alex paused in the car to make a few notes, then tossed her notepad on the passenger seat. She started the car and drove back to her place.

The first thing she did was tie up the bag from her kitchen trash. It wasn't quite full, but she couldn't bear the smell. Alex took the bag and opened the door, only to come face to face with a very healthy Nicole Wallace.

Thinking fast, she swung the trash bag, but it connected with its target at the same moment the needle pierced her skin. Alex pushed Nicole away, staggered back two steps, and collapsed in a heap on her floor.

* * *

"Goren," Bobby spoke into the phone as he finished the last bite of his pasta. He listened the speaker and choked a little. Coughing into his hand, he asked pardon and the caller repeated the message. "When?" Bobby asked urgently. His mouth grew taut and he said "Yeah," before he ended the call. "Damn," he muttered under his breath.

"What is it, Bobby?" Frances demanded. She knew something serious was going on.

"I have to call the Sheriff's office, Ma. Get a deputy back over here."

"She escaped?"

Bobby nodded. "Ask for your cannoli to go," he told her, and dug into his pocket for his wallet.

* * *

Nothing would move. Alex tried everything, but she couldn't so much as raise an eyelid. She could hear someone moving in the room, and fear gripped her as she realized it must be Wallace. Again, she tried to move, but only succeeded in escalating her sense of panic. She spent a few moments chastising herself for being so inattentive.

Then Alex talked herself into a more productive line of thinking. Nicole had a motive. She needed Alex alive for some reason. Alex thought, and it didn't take long to realize Wallace wanted to use her to get to Bobby.

If she could have moved, she would have laughed. Nicole had no idea where Alex Eames was on Bobby's priority list. She would have had better luck with his mother.


	24. Chapter 24

Chapter 24

This time, Alex managed to open her eyes. She couldn't see a thing except a blurry mess of color. It was impossible to make out any features of her surroundings. She closed her eyes again and instead practiced moving her fingers.

She found that she could move them, but it seemed they were sluggish. Alex listened hard, and realized she was alone. Afraid to bring Nicole back with another dose from her syringe, Alex remained silent. She tried to move her legs, but they were far too heavy. She tried to roll to her side and found that, too, was too difficult.

Alex opened her eyes, looked at the swirl of colors before her, and prayed that they would find her.

* * *

"Eames, I got a call, Wallace did escape. I'll meet you back at the squad, okay? We'll trace her path, track her down." He hung up the phone and found himself wondering why she didn't answer.

And it wasn't long before he was thinking about the things she'd said in the alley. About reciprocation.

* * *

Alex rationalized that the drug must be wearing off. She thought it would be prudent to save what energy she could use to move in case Wallace returned to deliver a second dose. She thought maybe, just maybe, she'd be able to surprise the woman. One good solid hit would do it. Maybe Wallace had misjudged the dosage, and she wouldn't expect Alex to have come out of it so soon.

So Alex lay still, conserving her energy. And she thought about Bobby.

She'd thought it was the right thing to say. She'd thought it was fair to lay it all on him, but now she was thinking differently.

She had been so afraid when he was missing. She couldn't imagine her life without him. Honestly, Alex realized that she spent a lot of time separate from him simply to prove to herself that she didn't need him. That she didn't love him.

And it was all a big fat lie.

If there was one thing she should have learned from that sharp pain that sliced through her heart when she saw him in intensive care, it was that she did love him. She loved him, she needed him, and the truth was, she wanted him.

And no, he wasn't good enough. He was intense and unpredictable and stupid in his brilliant kind of way. But she wanted him desperately. She wanted to feel his presence beside her. There was something about being near him. She felt better when he was beside her. She felt safer.

And the jolt that went through her when his lips touched hers… Alex had found the strength to push him away, but she couldn't deny herself the truth. She wanted more. She wanted to feel his warmth against her, and to know where he was soft and where he was hard.

It was so damned complicated, but it was so very simple. She loved him.

* * *

Ross stopped him before he made it to the elevators.

"I have to do this, Captain. It's personal. She's obsessed. If she's escaped, you can bet she has some kind of plan to get to me."

"All the more reason why you should stay away from it. Where's Eames?"

Bobby shook his head, looked down at his shoes, and scratched his fingernails against his scalp. "Uh, she hasn't returned my call. I'm a little worried, to tell you the truth."

"Eames can handle herself," Ross said.

Goren raised his head and looked his Captain in the eye. "She got to me, she can get to Eames."

Ross frowned. "Right. Well, where are you headed?"

"I thought I'd find Eames, and then go to Bellevue."

"Keep me in the loop."

Bobby spun and hurried to the elevators. For good measure, he called Alex again. Her voicemail message greeted him, and he hung up.

* * *

Nicole came back. Alex raised her lids halfway, and found she could make some sense of the swirling images before her. She saw Nicole's face, and thrusted quickly, as hard as she could manage. Her nails made contact with Nicole's face, and Alex tried desperately to hurt her.

Nicole had the advantage. She pulled away from Alex's grasp and jabbed her again with the needle, not so careful this time about how far she pushed the plunger.

Alex cried out, and as her body fell into uselessness again, she wondered where the sound had come from.

"Bloody bitch," Nicole snarled, dabbing the tips of her fingers against the bloody streaks Alex's fingernails had left on her face. "As soon as Bobby arrives, I'll kill you."

Nicole tossed the spent syringe on the floor before heading down the hall to the bathroom to wash her face.

* * *

Her car was in the drive, and the lid from her trash can wasn't closed all the way. Bobby's senses went on high alert. He walked carefully over and inspected the garbage can more carefully. The top bag could have easily been shifted so the lid would close. Alex would have made sure it was closed. Something was definitely wrong.

He withdrew his weapon and approached her door. Keeping himself clear of the window, he called out "Eames?"

No voice answered, but the door swung open. He couldn't see Wallace, but he clearly saw Alex's immobile form on the floor of her apartment. "Nicole," Bobby said, with cotton in his mouth.

She didn't answer. He raised his weapon and slowly stepped inside, until he was face to face with her.

"Oh, Bobby, there's no need for a gun." Nicole said calmly. "I wouldn't hurt you."

He didn't budge, even when she managed to kick the door shut. Bobby held the handgun firmly, keeping it aimed squarely at her chest.

"I think she's still alive," Nicole whispered, nodding her head at Eames.

_Black as hell and dark as night,_ a voice in his head kept repeating. "You're tricking me," he said. "You've been tricking me all along."

"Bobby, darling," Nicole said with a smile. "I only want one thing from you. But you were taking far too long." She glanced over at Eames again. "Aren't you worried about her?"

His face twisted up with pain. "You've killed her. I should kill you."

A brief trace of fear crossed Nicole's face, but she quickly masked it. She shook her head. "You can't kill me, Bobby. It would be like killing yourself. I'm a part of you," Nicole whispered. "and you me."

He shook his head and tears fell without his permission. "I can kill you," he growled at her. "And no one will ever know the circumstances."

"But you. Are you so determined to live a tortured life, Bobby?" Nicole smiled, and actually leaned closer to the gun. "Go to her. See if she's still breathing."

With a tortured cry, he pushed Nicole hard. Then he ran to Eames and squatted beside her, checking for a pulse with one hand even as he raised the Glock again with the other.

* * *

_Bobby's here! He's finally here!_ Alex's mind was racing. She could feel his warm hand against her neck. He thought she was dead. He thought Nicole had killed her.

His hand went from her neck to rest on the crown of her head. "Get your hands where I can see them," he told Nicole. His voice was colder than Alex had ever heard it.

Alex moved one finger. The drug was starting to wear off again. She could feel it. His warmth left her forehead and he gave Nicole another order. Alex tried to open her eyes. She needed to see what was happening.

"Over there, by the wall," Goren snapped at Nicole.

She did the one thing he didn't expect. She lowered her hand, and when she raised it up again, she was holding a full syringe against her own neck.

He made a sound, some kind of a tortured sound. "You're not gonna kill yourself, Nicole. You could never follow through with that."

Nicole began to cry. "I-I thought you would understand! After all that time! All those sessions with Huang, and you were there for me when I needed to talk it through!"

Bobby felt like his insides were twisting. He was furious that she'd hurt Alex, relieved Eames was still alive, but now he was starting to feel Nicole's pain, too. He shook his head, and his hands started to shake a little. "No, Nicole. You can't kill yourself. That's the coward's way out. You've never been a coward. Never, no matter what life kicked up at you."

"All I wanted was to have your baby," she cried. She looked at the gun in his hand. "I know now… you hate me, Bobby. You will never give me what I want."

He shook his head. If he told her no, she might kill herself. He had to string her along, give her some hope. "W-we can talk about it. You haven't mentioned that since…"

"You'll put the gun down? We can talk?"

His eyes went from the deadly syringe at her neck to the muzzle of his own gun. He slowly backed his left hand toward his body. He replaced the gun in its holster. "Okay. Okay, see? Your turn. Put down that syringe."

Nicole lowered it.

"All the way down, Nicole. You can't expect to have a conversation with me when you've got that within easy reach."

Nicole sputtered and cried, but the syringe dropped against the coffee table and rolled to the floor.

Alex couldn't see anything clearly, but her hearing was fine. She hung on every word, and listened to their movements, trying to match the colors to their locations in the room.

"Now. There. That's better," Bobby said. "Let's talk about it."

"You won't agree. You think I'm hideous."

He swung his head in a slow circle and swallowed. "I've never thought that."

"Still, after the things I've done… If you're afraid of having a schizophrenic child, I can't imagine what you think I could pass on to a child."

"You're the product of your environment, Nicole. I'm sure your child would be born healthy." He tried to move closer to her, but she stepped away from him. She knew he was going to try and subdue her.

"You wouldn't give me a sample last time."

"You had my mother, then."

Her eyes fell on Eames before she looked up at him once more. "Do you love her?" Nicole asked, suddenly free of tears.

Again, he felt his insides twisting. Whatever he felt for Alex, it wasn't something he would share with Nicole. "I don't know. We've worked together a long time."

"She hates me."

Bobby shrugged, and thought about the night in the alley.

_It's not a choice. Maybe it is._

And he knew without a doubt his choice was Alex. "She doesn't agree with a lot of things I do. A lot of people I spend time with."

"Do you hate me?"

He shook his head, long and slow. He tried to get closer to her again, but she slipped behind the couch and moved a few steps closer to where Eames lay on the floor.

Bobby's anxiety skyrocketed. He hadn't intended for her to get close to Alex. He worked his way back to the left as they continued to talk.

"I didn't know what to do," Nicole said. "I would never have the chance with you inside Rikers."

"So you planned to escape."

"Bobby, if I know you love me, I can stop everything. All the bad things. I can stop, if I just know you care." She got a little closer to Eames, and Bobby saw Nicole's hand drifting close to her pocket again.

"You can stop now, Nicole. Don't. Don't do it."

Her hands fell over her pocket, but she didn't dip her fingers in. Bobby's left hand reached for his weapon once more, but he didn't draw it out.

"Maybe," Nicole pondered aloud, "Maybe if she were gone, you wouldn't be so confused about everything."

"Don't hurt Alex," he warned her.

"We would both have our answers. You would know if you love her, and I would know if you love me."

"Nicole…" he watched her fingers sliding a narrow syringe up and out of her pocket. Bobby drew his weapon, aiming at her again.

Nicole flicked the protective cap off the needle. She made no move to use it yet, just stared at the syringe, almost with affection. "Yes, I think I like that. We would both get resolution. Release from our afflictions."

Alex Eames had her fingers wrapped around the discarded needle Wallace had used on her. The plunger hadn't been fully depressed. She rolled and jerked, and stabbed Nicole Wallace in the leg.

With a scream, Nicole brought the new needle down in a swipe, just as Bobby's gun fired.


	25. Chapter 25

A/N Well, I was trying really hard to wait until I had 100 reviews before posting this chapter, but I guess I'll go ahead and give it to you just since I like the word Crikey so much! :)

* * *

Chapter 25

After the shot, Goren tackled Wallace. She hit the floor hard, and he cuffed her. Then he turned back to Alex. He pulled out his phone and called 911 as he checked her pulse.

"Alex?!" he cried desperately, as tears filled his eyes.

"I'm bleeding!" Wallace cried pitifully. A pool of blood was gathering under her shoulder on the floor.

"Shut up, Nicole!" Bobby snarled. He gave the necessary information, his words rapid and filled with fear. Then he set the phone beside Alex on the floor and checked her pulse again.

By the time the EMTs arrived, he was doing CPR on Alex. They used the AED, and her heartbeat returned. He told them what he suspected about the chemicals, and badgered Nicole until she admitted it was Pancuronium Bromide. They whisked Alex away and the team of detectives that had just arrived called another bus for Nicole even as they questioned Bobby.

He couldn't concentrate. He was consumed with worry for Eames, and fury for the blond woman they were now treating for shock. His answers were clipped and furious, and he couldn't keep still. "I gotta-I gotta go. I have to see Eames," he told them. "Please!"

They'd made as much sense as they could from what he'd told them, and Bobby hurried outside.

"Look, Detective Goren, let Finch over there give you a ride. He'll put the lights on, get you there faster."

In a daze, Bobby agreed. He hurried over and climbed into the back of the cruiser.

* * *

"She's stabilized, but her vitals are very weak. We're monitoring her very closely."

Goren nodded, wide-eyed, and tucked his hand around the handle of the door. She was surrounded by equipment, with electrodes attached to her skin and a monitor displaying all of her vitals.

Through glassy eyes, Bobby stepped closer and reached for her hand. "Oh, God, Alex, I'm so sorry!" he breathed. "I should have listened to you. I shouldn't have given her the time of day. I'm so sorry," he said again.

* * *

Slowly, she was getting stronger. It was mesmerizing, really, sitting and watching the rhythmic display of her heart and her respiration drift across the screen.

Bobby spent a lot of time thinking. He ran and reran that conversation in the alley through his mind.

_What is it that makes her so appealing to you, Bobby? What are you getting out of it?_

He thought about that a lot. And Bobby realized that, somewhere along the way, he had convinced himself that so long as he could show compassion for even the worst of the worst, he was a good person. A good man. Better than his father, William. And better than his brother, Frank. And better than anybody ever expected him to be.

So he convinced himself that Nicole was a victim. A victim of the circumstances of her life, the same as him. And under the misguided idea that he had overcome all his trials, he had tried to save her.

And all the while he had picked and torn at the only good relationship in his life. The only person who had ever loved him for who he is instead of who he ought to be. And she'd almost died because of his stupidity.

He bounced his knee so much the nurses teased him that the shaking was affecting their readings. When his back started to ache, he stood and paced the room.

As he turned around for another pass across the foot of her bed, he stopped in his tracks. He swore he'd seen movement. Bobby moved closer. "Alex?" he asked quietly.

She wet her lips with her tongue.

Bobby was beside himself. "Alex, honey?" he asked again, desperate to speak with her, to have her back, fully with him.

Her brow furrowed, and slowly, her eyes opened. She didn't focus on anything, and her lids shut again.

"I'm here, honey. I'm here with you. Alex, it's okay now. Everything's okay."

* * *

"Bobby, you've got to get some sleep."

"I'm fine. I'm not leaving her."

Liz sighed. She looked at her sister, asleep in the bed. Alex had come to a few times, but she had a long way to go before she would be fully coherent. "I think Alex would want you to."

"No." _If you loved me, there would be something. Somehow, you would reciprocate._ "Look, I understand what you're trying to do, but… I have to stay. It's important."

"I don't see how you're holding up."

Bobby said nothing, but he answered her in his mind. _It's simple. I love her._

So Bobby paced while Alex's family sat at her side, and he sat in the chair at night when they left to go home. And in the wee hours of the morning, with his head on the mattress beside her hand, he fell asleep.

* * *

"Move it," Alex said. She tried to free her hand, but there was something heavy on it, a rock or something. She pulled her hand again. It wasn't a rock. Whatever it was, it was squishy.

"Ow!"

"Move."

Bobby's head jerked up, and he smiled at her. "You're awake!"

"You hurt my hand," she muttered, and immediately, he picked up her hand and rubbed the soreness away.

"Sorry, I guess I fell asleep."

"Bobby…" Alex looked around. "Hospital?"

He nodded. "Do you remember?"

"The trash…" Alex said, but none of the other details came to mind.

"Long story," he said. "The good news is you're okay."

"I'm hungry," she told him.

Bobby grinned, and there was a special spark in his eyes that was only for her. "I'll tell the staff," he said. He got to his feet, and before he walked away, he spun, turning back to her. "And Alex?"

She looked up at him.

"I love you."

Alex didn't try to make sense of it. She was too tired to make sense of anything. She did find herself with a smile on her face.


	26. Chapter 26

Chapter 26

Ross had come and gone more than once. Alex was scheduled to be moved out of ICU by afternoon, and her family was back for the day. Bobby still refused to leave her, but wouldn't explain why. His only request was that Liz not speak to Alex about it.

It didn't matter, anyway. He was on administrative leave until IAB determined if it was a "good" shoot or not. His phone rang. He slipped it out of his pocket and answered as he walked toward the hall.

"How is she?" Ross inquired.

"Better, sir. Getting stronger by the minute."

"IAB wants you to come in for interrogation."

"No. I'm not leaving her."

"Goren, she's in good hands."

"Look, I'll talk to them, okay? But they can come here. I'm not leaving Alex."

"You'd better give them your full cooperation, Goren."

"I will. But here at the hospital. I don't think that's too much to ask. She's still in ICU, after all."

"All right. You want me to come along?"

"No, Captain, it's all right. I'll answer their questions."

* * *

The detective for Internal Affairs held up an evidence bag. It contained a syringe. "The plunger was almost fully depressed. Your partner got twice the dose for a person her size…"

"She almost died," Goren said. "I had to do CPR."

"And Wallace was cuffed on the floor beside your partner?" Bobby nodded. "Why didn't you treat her injuries?"

"I assessed the situation. Eames' life was in danger. Nicole's was not. I had already called 911. I knew help was on the way."

"You didn't request a second bus."

A flash of anger swelled inside him. "My partner's heart stopped! I was a little preoccupied."

"Okay," the man said quietly as he scrawled a few notes. Bobby glanced back into Eames' room, and saw that her sister was helping her get a drink. They were standing in the hallway, which was as far away as Goren was willing to go. "How did the shot come off?"

"We were squared off. I'd just spent at least ten minutes trying to talk her down, but she reached in her pocket and got another syringe out." Bobby bobbed his head at the evidence bag. "She was talking about killing Eames. I drew my weapon. She just kept saying she was going to kill her… and then Eames struck at her. Nicole's reaction was to drop down, stab her with that full syringe. I fired my weapon."

"Eames struck first?"

"She was being held against her will. It probably took everything she had to do it. She was trying to save herself."

"You said Wallace was threatening to kill Eames. Why? Why didn't she kill her before you arrived?"

Bobby scratched his chin and frowned. "Wallace is a psychopath. She's got this infatuation with me. She said it was the only way she would know if I loved her or not."

They asked for a few more details of what transpired before the shot, and then they went back to 1PP. Bobby took a deep breath and turned to look at Alex. She was smiling at something her sister had said. Bobby smiled too. He walked back in to join them.

* * *

Alex stared out the windshield of the mustang and thought for a long time about her partner. He'd been there. Every time she could remember waking up in the hospital, he'd been there. And he hadn't seemed to give a rat's ass about what had happened to Nicole. He didn't even speak of her, except to answer if Alex asked.

"You okay?" He asked, glancing over at her as he drove.

"Yeah," she said quietly. "Just thinking." She gave Bobby a smile. Her family had made sure her apartment was cleaned after the crime scene tape was removed. He was taking her home.

"You know, it might feel funny… you might have an emotional response from the, you know, situational memory…"

Alex looked over at him, her eyes wide with her question.

Bobby nodded. "I can stay with you… if you want."

"Don't you have to work or something?" Alex asked after accepting his offer.

Bobby shrugged. "IAB hasn't closed the case yet. I'm still on leave."

"God, what's taking them so long?" Alex complained. She worried that somehow Bobby would get a ding in his jacket for this.

He smiled at her. "I don't mind," he said.

"They asked me… why you shot her, Bobby."

He gave her a glance, but focused on the road. IAB had interrogated Alex just this morning.

"I remember punching her with that syringe, but I don't remember anything after that."

"It took a lot out of you to strike at her."

"I thought if I could distract her or something, it would give you an opportunity."

"It did. You were right."

Alex folded her arms across her chest, trying to remember anything she could about that day. Her mind offered nothing, and she was left with the whispers she had heard amongst her family when she was in the hospital.

"Johnny said I died."

"What? No."

"You didn't do CPR?"

"Well, yeah, but only for a minute, and as soon as they shocked you, you came right back." Just thinking about it was bringing back his anxiety. Alex reached over and touched his arm.

He looked her way quickly, and then stretched out his arm to take her hand. The warmth of the touch was all it took to set them both at ease. He pulled into the drive and went around to help her out of the car.

Alex was rooting through her purse. "My keys," she said.

"Never mind. Your Dad installed a new lock." He held the new key up to show her. Alex closed her purse and let Bobby put his arm around her as she walked to her front door. She could have walked it alone, but she liked being close to him.

He handed her the key and she unlocked the door. Bobby's arm stayed tight around her when she first walked in, and she was glad for it. He was right. A wave of fear and frustration washed over her as soon as she saw her living room.

After a few minutes, Bobby spoke. "Okay?" he asked her. Alex nodded, and so he let go of her. He went back and made sure the door was locked.

"Bobby," Alex said, suddenly feeling nervous. "We need to talk."


	27. Chapter 27

Chapter 27

She said it, and then she held her hand out, waiting for his. Bobby gave his hand willingly, and followed her to the couch.

Eames never let go. She sat beside him, still holding that giant hand of his, and she tried to figure out where to start. "A lot has happened," she finally said.

Bobby nodded, and let his left hand roam until it found her free one. Now they sat huddled together, each clinging to the other's hands.

"I think I owe you an apology," Alex said.

"What?! No, Alex. If anything, I owe you one."

"No, Bobby. I get very… full of myself sometimes. Sometimes I think if I'm hard enough I can just forge everything and everyone else into what I think they should be. You're a grown man, with a good head on your shoulders. If you thought it was important to visit Nicole, I should have trusted that you had a good reason."

"I didn't."

Alex was caught speechless for a moment. "Huh?"

"I thought about this a lot when you were in the hospital, Alex." He paused, suddenly afraid to continue. "All of the things I was telling myself… about why I was seeing her…" Bobby shook his head. "I get too cocky sometimes. I think I know everything."

"You're being hard on yourself," Alex said, but Bobby squeezed her hands.

"I learned something, Alex." He looked into her eyes. "I love you."

She gave him a smile. "I love you, too."

He shook his head, still wearing a small smile. "I know now. You're more important to me than anything. Anyone."

Alex chuckled quietly. "You sure made it look that way," she whispered. "I'm glad you were with me. It helped."

"I wanted to… to reciprocate. But even more so, I wanted to be… close to you."

She leaned against him, and their hands finally loosed only to wrap around each other's backs. Long, silent caresses occupied them both until Alex finally pulled away. "What do we do, then?"

He licked his lips. "You rest. Heal. I hang around, you know, until you get sick of me."

Now Alex shook her head. "Even if we knock heads sometimes… I won't be sick of you." Alex stretched her mouth towards his, and he met her halfway. They shared a long, gentle kiss. "I'm glad you're gonna hang around," Alex added, and Bobby kissed her again.

* * *

Alex was sleeping in the bedroom, and Bobby busied himself cleaning the after-dinner mess in her kitchen. He answered his phone on the first ring.

"Goren," he said.

"Good news, Detective. How's Eames?"

"Uh, sleeping, sir."

"IAB cleared you. It was a good shoot. You can come back tomorrow."

Bobby let go a sigh of relief. With a nod, he said, "Good."

"And Wallace is back in the Pen. She was released today."

"Thanks for the update, Captain."

"Give Eames my best."

"I'll do that." Bobby said goodbye and ended the call. Then he searched her place until he found her cell phone. The battery was long dead after her hospital stay. He rooted around until he found a charger and plugged it into the wall. Then Bobby opened her contact list and found her sister's number.

"Hello?"

"Hello, Liz, it's Bobby Goren."

"Bobby, is everything okay?" He could hear the worry in Liz's voice.

"Yeah, sure, everything's fine. I uh… I got a call from the Captain and I'm cleared for work tomorrow. So I wanted to make sure someone could stay with Alex."

"Oh yeah, sure, of course. What time do you want me to come over?"

"I, uh… maybe around 8?"

"All right, Bobby. I'll be there at 8. Can I talk to her?"

"She's asleep right now," he told her. "I can have her call you later."

"No, that's okay. Only if she wants to."

"Okay, thank you, Liz."

"No, thank you, Bobby. For being there for my sister."

After he got off the phone, Bobby checked the clock. It was only 8:30, but his exhaustion was starting to catch up with him. He decided to go check in on Alex before turning in for the night.

"Who called?" she asked sleepily.

"Uh, Ross. I go back to work tomorrow. Good shoot."

She sighed in relief and touched her hand to his arm.

"You okay?" Bobby asked her.

"Yeah. I can't believe I'm so tired. All I did in the hospital was sleep, after all."

He gave her a sweet smile. "You must need it." Bobby let go a great yawn, covering his mouth with his hand.

"You need some sleep, too," Alex told him.

"I'm going," he said. "I just wanted to check on you first, and then I'll crash on the couch."

"Why not here?" Alex asked, rolling onto her back.

His face sobered and his eyes drifted over the curves of her body. Alex picked up his hand and brought it to rest on her abdomen. Bobby moved his hand in a lazy circle. "You sure you want that?" he asked.

She didn't say a word, but her eyes burned as she looked at him, and she gave him a little nod. Bobby leaned over and kissed her. Still kissing, he climbed over her on his hands and knees. Alex's hands found his whiskers, centering his mouth over hers and demanded more.

It was bliss. Bobby lost himself in her kisses, and finally reality crashed in on him. He groaned and pulled away. He flopped to the mattress on her other side and worked his clothes off. Alex rolled to her side and helped him with the buttons and the zipper. Her hand roamed to places it had never been before, and he groaned again.

"We do this, neither one of us will sleep," he whispered, and accepted her tongue at his lips.

"You want to sleep?" she asked him, nipping at the whiskers on his jaw.

Bobby's weary eyes smoldered. His head barely moved when he shook it. "I need to sleep," he said sadly.

Alex drew back a little, looking at him with pure affection. "I love you, Bobby. Let's get some sleep."

He turned to one side and kissed her one last time. "I love you, too, Alex. Good night."


	28. Chapter 28

Chapter 28

"I might as well go in. I'm going to be bored stiff sitting around here."

"Alex. You just got out of the hospital."

"Well, at least I waited to leave until they told me I could."

He accepted the jibe with a smile. "All right, fair enough. Just give yourself a couple of days. Maybe you'll get some more sleep."

"I can't possibly need any more sleep. Look at me. I'm totally pepped for the day!"

"Yeah, I know. I know. But Liz is already on her way over. So stay here with her and just see how the day pans out. I'll call you later, okay?"

Alex finally gave in. "Okay." She moved close to Bobby and they embraced. "Don't do anything exciting without me."

"Exciting. C'mon, Eames. I'll spend the day pushing paperwork, I promise." He kissed her then, and she let her hands drift down over his ass. Her doorbell rang, and the two broke apart, panting like naughty teenagers. They grinned at each other and then Alex let her sister in while Bobby grabbed his wallet and his phone. "Bye," he called, waving at the two women without looking back.

* * *

Liz answered Alex's phone when Bobby called at lunch. "Hi, Liz," he said. "How is she?"

"She insisted on doing laundry this morning, and now she's asleep."

He grinned. That was just like Alex, to think she could take on more than she could. "I'm glad I convinced her to stay home today," he said.

"Bobby, I'd like to ask you something…"

"What is it?"

"Are you and Alex… you know, more than friends?"

He paused before answering, which in itself answered her question. "Maybe that's something you should talk to your sister about."

"It's okay, you know. We all like you, Bobby, and we can't thank you enough for what you did for her."

"I didn't do anything special," he muttered. "Look, Liz, I will tell you one thing. Alex means a lot to me."

"Well. I think we all knew that already, Bobby. Do you want me to have her call you when she wakes up?"

"No, I'll come over after work. It's okay."

* * *

Bobby stopped at his place first. He took a shower and packed some clothes to stay with her for a few days. Then he bought her some flowers at a little shop on the corner before he drove out to her place.

He tucked the flowers against his duffel bag and carried his garment bag over his shoulder to her door. He dropped the duffel bag on the stoop and picked up the flowers to greet her with them. Then he rang the bell.

Upon seeing the flowers, Alex broke into a wide smile. Bobby handed them to her, then he picked up his bag and walked in. He hung the garment bag on the closet door and left his duffel tucked into a corner.

"Where's Liz?" he asked.

"I sent her home," Alex explained, "about an hour ago. Nate was having some kind of a fit without her, and I feel fine, so…"

Bobby took her in his arms. He nodded at her explanation and bent down to kiss her. "Hi," he breathed.

"Hi," she replied, and kissed him again.

* * *

"Oh, please." Nicole rolled her eyes, folded her arms, crossed her leg so her foot was pointing at the opposite wall, and frowned.

"What? You seem… annoyed," Huang said.

"Do you really think…" she began, lifting her chin to show him a wicked grin, "that you've helped me?" She laughed. "You are full of yourself, aren't you, Doctor?"

"I think we made some progress…"

If it were possible, Nicole's smile turned even more evil looking. "You think that because I wanted you to think it."

"Now who's full of themselves?"

Her smile faded. "I'm going to kill them, you know. Both of them. And I'm going to take great pleasure in watching Bobby while she suffers."

"You have plans to harm them?"

Nicole closed her mouth and smiled. She didn't say another word.

* * *

Bobby and Alex had just arrived at Carmel Ridge when her phone rang. "Eames," she said. "Okay, thank you Captain." She ended the call and looked up at Bobby. "Nicole Wallace. She's planning to kill us both as soon as she gets the chance. Huang has prescribed a major cocktail of drugs, but she's refusing to take them."

"She's still locked up?"

Alex nodded.

"No problem," Bobby said. He put his arm around Alex and walked comfortably with her into the home.

"Hello, Mr. Goren," the nurse said. "Your mother has been expecting you."

Bobby signed the visitor log, and so did Alex. Then he took her hand and they walked down the hall together. In the elevator, he stole a kiss. Grinning at her, he walked her to his mother's door and knocked.

"Come in," came her sharp voice.

"Hello, Ma," he called. "I brought Alex this time."

"Alexandra! Good to meet you," she said. "I told Bobby to bring you before, so I could thank you for all you did to catch that Devil, Wallace."

"We were a little busy, Ma." Bobby loosened his tie and unbuttoned the top buttons of his shirt. He sat on the couch and put his feet up on her coffee table.

Frances pushed his feet to the floor. "Where are your manners?" She chastised him. "You can't even be presentable for five minutes?!" Bobby's mother gave Alex a look of apology.

Alex grinned. Then she turned to Bobby. "Not even five minutes, Bobby?"

With a grin, he shook his head and buttoned his shirt again. Then he cinched his tie. "Better?" he asked them both.

"Much," the women said together. Frances took Alex by the hand. "How are you feeling, dear? Bobby told me he couldn't make it the last two weeks because that woman nearly killed you."

"I'm okay," Alex said. "Thank you."

"I don't understand why he never listens."

Bobby groaned. "If you two are going to gang up on me, I'll just go for a walk or something."

"Bobby. Dear. This is important," Frances said. "You captured her?"

"Yeah, Ma. She's in jail again."

"Where she belongs." She looked approvingly at him and then Eames. "And you're not bothering to visit her now, either?"

"No, Ma."

"He's not," Alex confirmed.

"I'm done with her," Bobby added.

"And you…?" Frances asked, eyeing Alex. "You're the one who's won his heart?"

"I don't know about that," Alex said with a blush.

"No, Ma, she's always had it," Bobby said, his eyes glimmering at Alex. "Can I lose this tie, now?" he asked, and they all laughed.


	29. Chapter 29

Chapter 29

"Thanks for taking me with you, Bobby." They had taken his mother out for dinner, and then decided to go for a walk by the lake. Even as August approached, the evenings still clung to the heat of the day. "It's kind of hard to believe that even after everything, I really hadn't ever met your mom."

He tucked his chin down and grinned. "She liked you." He took a few more steps and snuck a glance Alex's way. "It's not every day she teams up with somebody, trying to straighten me out…"

"Oh, Bobby, you don't think—" Alex reached a hand out to touch his arm.

Bobby laughed. "It was just in fun. I know." On a whim, he leaned over and kissed Alex's cheek. Then he walked along slowly, and her hand tucked around his elbow. He reached over with his left and squeezed her hand firmly against his arm.

They made their way down the path until they came to a bench seat that was on a little boat dock. Bobby led Alex over and held her hand as she sat down. Then he whirled around and sat beside her. The lake water lapped up against the dock, and now and then a fish jumped somewhere out in the darkness.

"It's beautiful here," Alex said. "Your Mom must love it."

He shrugged. "She likes it sometimes. And other times she pines for the days when she could gossip out on the stoop."

"It must have been hard for you, moving her up here."

He pressed his lips together. Hard didn't even begin to describe that time of his life. He'd just made detective and he was afraid he would get demoted, what with all the time he'd been called out to go see about his Mom. So he'd shopped around, researched the place thoroughly, and he knew it was a good facility. But she was despondent about leaving her home. And he'd taken it like a punch to the gut, but he'd followed through. He'd moved her to Carmel Ridge and somehow kept his job through it all.

Bobby shrugged again. "Yeah, well, it was for the best, after all," he said. He scooped up a pebble off the boards at his feet and plunked it into the water.

"You don't want to talk about her."

He looked at Alex, shook his head, then looked out at the water again. "No, I don't mind."

Alex smiled and reached a hand out to touch the curls at the back of his neck. It was starting to grow out again, and Alex found the little locks irresistible.

"You know, I never meant to let you down."

"What?" Alex had no idea where his train of thought was going.

"Never meant to hurt you, or to let you down. I would never… I could never do that to you, Alex. Not intentionally. I try to… to do what I have to do without… without… you know, like my mother. I love her, Alex, I do, but I know what she's like when… and I would never want you to have to… to deal with that like I do. And I guess when anything that's… hard… or difficult pops up in my life, I just want to… to, you know, take care of it, and just leave you out of the picture."

"You're talking about Nicole."

He nodded. "I didn't know for sure what I was getting myself into, but I knew that… I didn't want you to be involved."

Alex bit her lip for a minute. She didn't want to get into it with him again, over _her_, but as she thought, she found she couldn't let it go. "But by cutting me out, you hurt me."

Bobby frowned and a pained look washed over his face. He raised his eyes to look into hers. "I know it. And I'm sorry, Alex. I'm so, so sorry."

"You said that before, when I was in the hospital."

"Yeah, but I should say it again. I should apologize to you every day."

"Oh, God, Bobby, don't do that." Her voice and her face were deadpan, but she was teasing him.

"I love you, Alex. I've loved you for a long time."

Alex wanted to kiss him, both to change the subject and to let him know she loved him, too. But Bobby stood up. Alex sat back in surprise, and Bobby pointed out at the trail of the moonlight on the water.

"You see that?" he asked her, his voice filled with excitement.

"What, a fish?"

"No, the light. The light from the moon."

"Yeah, sure I see it."

"C'mere," Bobby said, taking her hand. He got down on his knees at the edge of the dock and tugged her hand until she was on her knees beside him. The streak of moonlight skimmed on the water straight to them. Bobby let go her hand and lay on his stomach, reaching out over the water. "This is my love for you," he said. "Sometimes, sometimes it gets—" Bobby splashed his hand in the water, and the beam of light gnarled and twisted at the edges, but it still burned straight toward her. "But I still come back to you," he explained. He sat up, and there was a look of relief on his face, like it was something he'd been trying to understand all his life and had just come to terms with.

Alex reached forward and kissed him, breathing words of love when her lips got the chance. Bobby raised his hand and pointed at the moon, until she finally stopped kissing him and pulled back.

"And that's you. Clear as day… steady… bright… and beautiful."

She lowered her eyes. "I'm not so perfect," she told him.

"You are to me. You're everything to me, Alex." They fell into another kiss, and Bobby's arms wrapped around her.

"We should get back to the city," she whispered once she got the chance to speak.

"Let's stay here," Bobby suggested.

"Here?"

"For a while," he grinned. "And there's a hotel up the street."

They sat by the water until the mosquitos started biting, and then they walked back up the hill to the car. Bobby drove her to the Ridgetop Inn, and they stared at the moonlight from the picture window in the room until his lips eased hot and wet against the back of her neck. Alex felt his hand slip inside her pants, and she arched her neck. She found his lips and kissed him hungrily while his fingers drifted into dark and exciting places.

Neither one of them held back.

THE END

* * *

A/N Thank you all for reading and for your reviews! And thanks to CherylWB again for everything! I hope you all enjoyed it! P.S. Dee, if you log in and get a profile here, then I can PM you and answer your questions!


End file.
